I would be lying if I sat here and wrote about all the ways long distance is easy in hopes that you would believe me. I wouldn’t be lying, however, if I told you all the reasons it’s difficult and beautiful and worth it. Although we may do distance because it is the best thing for us or them or the both of us, or we do distance because we simply have no choice, with the right person, it is so unbelievably worth it.
All of the lonely nights and hard moments become lost in the sea of valuable ones spent together. The hardest of days seem to vanish the minute we are in our person’s arms. So I’ll sit here and tell you about the hard things, because they make the easy ones so meaningful.
First and foremost, leaving never gets easier. Saying goodbye after a weekend together is just as hard as the first time you both parted ways. It is just as hard as the last time you said goodbye, and it will be just as hard as the next time you do. Leaving sucks, plain and simple. But what makes leaving so much more worth it is knowing that every day you’re one day closer to holding them in your arms again. Leaving makes even the shortest weekends together mean an entire lifetime. Knowing that in 48 short hours you will have to say goodbye again seems to make you slip away into a universe composed entirely of your person. There is no outside care or worry, just the moments with them. And I can tell you wholeheartedly that in those 48 hours, although they may seem small, you will feel an overwhelming amount of love and peace in every corner of your heart.
Second, you might think you truly know the ins and outs of your person and the way they communicate, but long distance opens a whole new can of worms you have yet to discover. In the beginning, this is going to be HARD. Some days you will frustrate each other trying to figure out one another and how to deal with this big change and it might feel exhausting. Long distance allows you to find a deeper form of connection and communication with your person that goes beyond simple conversations and “reading” each other when you’re in person, because that simply is not an option anymore. Long distance creates a space for you to truly understand the way that your person conveys their love for you and themselves, all of their pure emotions, and the things in life and in your relationship that they value. When you are doing long distance, there is no longer room to act upset in hopes your person will notice. There is no longer room to push aside the emotions. There is only room to speak directly and tell each other exactly how you feel and why.
These are the things that make you so much stronger on the other side of the distance. It’s easy to become comfortable with how we and our person functions every day and to forget about the way we are as people down into our core. These aren’t easy to forget when you are apart for so long. In fact, you are forced to pay attention to these each and every day, but those things create a bond that is shatterproof and resistant to simple miscommunication.
So, let me tell you this: Long distance is tough, and some days are better than others. However, I promise you that with the right person it’s worth it and it is indescribably beautiful. The moments you will have with your person in those short 48 hours are ones that you wouldn’t trade even for all of the distance. The way that you will truly learn about every nook and cranny of your person is something you also wouldn’t trade for the distance. Don’t be scared, because in a matter of days or weeks or months, you will be in their arms again, and for good this time.