They say when you start a relationship at a young age, you’re lucky. People say that it is actually a good thing because aside from the lessons you will learn, you get to bloom with your partner.
We started it young — my love and I. We just reached our teenage years but somehow it all lead to this moment. I was a different person when I met him. I was the weaker version of myself. I found my voice with him. I stood proud and confident with him. A lot of things could happen in a day, you can just imagine how is it been for two years and six months. We loved, we fought and sought for the impossible.
We went through all kinds of emotion together. We experienced many of our firsts and maybe some of our lasts. If I could turn back time, I would never change our story but he is a quicksand and my thoughts are treacherous.
Growing with the love of your life can both be a blessing and a curse.
As we grow, we undergo changes. Every day is a new day. It is a chance for us to change and start over. I have always accepted the fact that change is permanent and will always be a part of my life but this was the change I wasn’t prepared for.
I have to accept the fact that my life can never be on pause just because he’s gone. This change — a life without him, a life without someone to share my stories with, a life without the person who stood with me through everything. The change of us growing apart. Maybe we were too early. Maybe we were too fast. Maybe we had the right love at the wrong time.
We have to grow apart or else we wouldn’t grow at all.
It is funny isn’t it — how time works? It is just an abstract concept but people wish they could grasp and feel it for them to feel they could really stop it, for them to feel they have power over it.
Time either breaks or makes you.
For almost three years, time shaped our relationship. It is the reason why I am who I am today and he is who he is today. It showed its power to break us and turn us into a different person at the same time. Time is both our friend and enemy. For now, we both need time for us to heal. We need time for us to grow apart.
Only time could tell if it’s really us against the world. Only time could tell if we’d somehow find our way back to each other regardless of how long we’ve been ghosts to each other’s lives.
Nothing is really certain. Nothing is written. All I know is we need time and solitude for us to be better for each other or the saddest truth, maybe we’re preparing ourselves for someone better.