He Won’t Complete You Because You Are Already Whole

selective photography of woman wearing gray knit top and black framed eyeglasses
Ayo Ogunseinde / Unsplash

So many of us are on a never-ending search for “the one.”

The one who will fill that void within, that we’ve been told can only be filled by the love of another.

The one who will make us finally feel complete.

Here’s the problem with that: it teaches us that we are incomplete as we are.

And that leads to us feeling all kinds of inadequate.

And it signs your power over to someone else – a total stranger.

I need you to know that no one out there can ever complete you.

There is no person who will make all your problems, fears, and insecurities evaporate into thin air.

There is no person who’s going to sweep into your life and save you from yourself.

There is no person who can make you feel whole – because you already are.

You might not realise it, but everything you could possibly need can be found within you.

That companionship you’re hungry for? You’ll feel it when you spend some quality time alone with yourself, and you don’t feel lonely.

That validation you think you need? You don’t need it. And a relationship isn’t going to give you it anyway. Start approving of yourself the way you are today.

That love you’re seeking out there? That’s what your entire soul is made of. You are already an infinite flow of love.

That wholeness you crave? It’s because the world has convinced you that you’re merely half, when the truth is you are the whole. You are enough as you are.

We make the mistake of seeking a partner, because of the love we hope we’ll get from them. But that’s not what real love is about. Real love is going into a relationship and focusing on what you can give that person.

And how can you possibly give so selflessly, when you don’t believe you have that much to give? When you believe love is scarce and runs out?

I’ve got a theory about “the one.”

That one, is you.

Most of us run around avoiding our difficult truths, and use other people as a distraction.

We place the burden of our own happiness onto them, and then wonder why we’re not happy.

What are we all really searching for?

Ourselves. Our true souls. Our true hearts.

And our own love, and acceptance.

Find this, and you will meet your wholeness. TC mark

Shani Jay

Join me on Instagram for more sunshine, and check out my book, Bloom.

This is for all of the girls still learning to love themselves…

…the girls who feel like they don’t measure up, who’ve wished they could wake up as someone else for a day, who feel like they’re somehow less than what they should be. This is for all of you who have been led to believe your beautiful souls are not enough.” 🌸
“This book came to me at the perfect time—it is so genuine, uplifting and powerful! If you are looking for something that will soothe your soul and motivate you to love YOU for exactly who you are and become the women you aspire to be, this is the book for you!”—Danielle
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