Life is not a static event, nor is it a series of unbroken similarities. Life comes in waves of happiness and hardships, and sometimes there are more waves crushing you, drowning you, than waves lifting you up.
The beauty of it is that balance keeps us living, fighting, surviving — and most important of all, it keeps our faith that nothing, no matter how hard it is, will last forever.
But sometimes life becomes too hard on you, like it’s artistically torturing you for existing. Hard becomes an understatement, unbearable, unlivable, earth cracking beneath you.
You start to doubt that at the end of this dark alley there will be light. You start questioning: Am I damned? Will I ever be happy? Is this life fair? Why me?
This may make you feel better: You’re not alone. Everyone is hiding his own pain. If you looked deeper in everyone’s soul, you’d find that person struggling not to give up hope.
I know everyone has a different capacity of handling pain, and your pain is valid, you have the right to crumble, but I’m asking you please don’t.
I’m telling you it’s worth holding onto your faith. Sometimes there’s just a very fine line between you and a steep downfall to losing your faith, your religion even, and I know it’s not something that happens out of the blue, it’s a process of life being too damn hard on you.
It’s a series of disappointments, cracks in your faith and hope. Then light stitches up your broken insides. And then disappointments knock you down on your knees again, one after the other until your soul is sore. Your faith is like crumbled paper.
That rope attaching you to what’s keeping you hoping is squeezing the life out of you, and giving up never felt so easy. At that moment you believe it’s the only thing that will keep you sane.
But believe me, it’s not. Hope is what keeps us alive, so you’ll be one foot in one foot out, saying life is not fair but praying for resolution, telling yourself you want to give up but telling others going through hardships that God is great, God is hope, and God never dies so your hope should never end.
You say it with your insides twisting not understanding if you believe it anymore, thinking you should say it too many times, repeat it like a mantra until you believe it. Feed it to yourself before you feed it to others.
You pray even when your heart doesn’t feel the greatness of God while kneeling down, you pray so you force yourself to feel something and I promise you — you will, you just have to keep pushing.
There is a fine line between giving up and having miracles come to your rescue. The moment it’s all closed doors magic happens and light seeps in.
I am asking you to keep fighting, keep hoping, this too shall pass.