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Drink when ambivalence haunts you.

But beyond just making the waiter’s life miserable for the hour or so spent in the restaurant, this person clearly holds service jobs in general in extremely low esteem — something that should essentially be punishable by death at this point.

If you work in a store that uses a playlist of fewer than 100 songs for in-store music, you will probably show up for work one day wearing a trench coat and wielding an axe while screaming the lyrics to a Michelle Branch or Maroon 5 song.

You can apply what you’ve learned from Women’s Studies to any situation — it’s not so much a career choice as it is a life choice; you’re adopting a new perspective that you’ll use in every relationship, every job, and every circumstance.

Pick up some items, including a few things you would never try on anywhere else. Whatever, these high-waisted zebra print pants are 16 bucks, and no one you know is here to judge. You only live once, right?

You might see a scone at a trendy, locally-owned coffee shop and wonder about whether or not the sugar in the scone was harvested primarily by men or women.

There is quite possibly nothing more irritating and homicidal-feelings-inducing than being somewhere with your girlfriend and having some unimaginative weirdo ask “So who’s the guy?”

When you were young, people would gather at parties to watch you imbibe and exclaim, How does he keep on drinking without getting drunk or sick? This was your training ground.

Two days after my mother had cradled a small piece of happiness in her hand, her body performed its most treacherous act and unraveled that knotted ball of chromosomes. Mitosis taught her an important lesson: to become whole, you must at first be broken.

And now, with a new name and the false, clean sense of erased history, he takes a train and joins his cousin in Georgia, where an untangled root of his family strain found soil before. He finds himself in Savannah (or possibly Marietta, or Bainbridge, where he will one day be forgotten in the amalgam of the family burial plot, a plot he will buy himself) and begins his tenure at his cousin’s Laundromat.

I walked up a set of stairs and into the doctor’s office that looked more suited to treat broken surfboard leashes than patients. Everything about the décor drew inspiration from the Pacific.

Here are my suggestions about what your favorite Game of Thrones character might say about who you are.

I mean, I had always grown up knowing that men similar to me (such as Jay-Z) always prefer their women in “no panties and jeans, that’s so necessary,” but I hadn’t really encountered any who had taken Jigga Man’s gospel to heart. ?