The pain is a cold wind bearing against me, pushing me back. I don’t know what else to do but write to you.
With no warning, I feel the shadow again. That goddamn shadow.
When he said he could grab women by the pussy, people defended him. Women defended him. Women demonized his accusers.
Society will have taught you, or maybe just convinced you every woman is standing at the top of her own metaphorical castle tower, screaming in horror at the thought of dying alone, waiting impatiently for you to rescue her. Not the case with us my friends.
These are not your wounds to heal, but we are thankful every day that we wake up and you are still there beside us.
You relish having somebody in your life like this, but you don’t believe either of you belong to the other; that idea has faded.
You raised yourself, reminding yourself you were worth something.
You might feel more alone than ever before…but the truth is that you’re not.
You may find yourself feeling nothing, and this is normal. You may find yourself wailing incoherently on the bathroom floor at 2 am. This is also normal.
There are some days when I see the chair clearly, it is in the middle of the room, and I am too exhausted to ignore it. With its offensive upholstery and third-rate stitching, I collapse into it.