I Miss When We Made Sense

I don’t know if you remember it anymore, but I’ve never been able to forget. There was a time a while ago where you and I made perfect sense. We understood each other, and my life made more sense. I thought you were going to be in it forever. I was wrong, though. You’re not in my life anymore, and it hurts. It hurts that we stopped making sense.

Our disagreements started as minor things. That’s normal for any friendship. Friends don’t agree on everything, do they? No, of course not. Not everyone agrees on every little thing. Not everyone can always agree on every part of life. Friends disagree, but they can always come back and carry on their friendships.

You and I made sense throughout our arguments, throughout our difficulties, throughout our frustrations—we made sense. You were one of the closest friends I’ve ever had. I never knew it would turn into this, though. I never wanted it to turn into this. We don’t make sense anymore. Hell, we barely even talk anymore.

It’s been over a year since we’ve talked—it feels like forever. People get wrapped up in things. That’s normal. We both have our own lives now, but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss you. We were so close. We were the best of friends; I could tell you anything. When we disagreed, there would be arguments or silence, but we’d come back and talk again.

I never imagined that we’d stop making sense. Our friendship no longer makes any sense whatsoever; it doesn’t make sense for us to keep trying. You’ve turned into a completely different person. I can’t put all the fault on you, though. I’ve changed, too.

When people tell you that you’ve changed, it’s often meant in a derogatory way. I take it as a compliment, and so should you. We’ve both changed, and we’ve both gone in different directions. We’ve bettered ourselves, and truthfully, maybe we’re better without each other. We’re better staying separated.

That doesn’t mean that I don’t miss you, though. I miss the days we leaned on each other. We’d come up with code words when we needed one another. I failed those at times, and I wasn’t always the best, but we would always come back and forgive each other. We’d meet up for patio drinks and everything would be okay.

Neither of us is the person we were years ago now, though. Our friendship has gone in such a different direction that we don’t make sense. We can try again, and maybe we will someday, but right now, we don’t make sense anymore. I miss the days we made sense. We could drink wine and watch silly shows, make fun of everything, talk about the other people in our lives.

Our friendship could withstand anything. Well, it could withstand anything, but right now, it hasn’t. We haven’t made sense in such a long time, and that’s okay. I miss when we made sense; I miss when our friendship was as strong as we believed it to be. I miss it when we would talk about any and everything.

You and I, we may not make sense anymore. Our friendship might not make sense anymore, but I miss it, and I miss you. I accept that things will never be the way they were, but I’ll always remember you as a huge part of my life, and I miss you.

I miss it when we made sense and felt indestructible. It’s okay, though. We don’t make sense, and we’re both at different points in our lives, but you were and always will be a huge part of mine. Here’s to us and our friendship, to learning from each other for years, to being as close as we were, and to being the type of people that are okay letting go. Here’s to us accepting that we don’t make sense anymore. Here’s to missing when we did make sense, and here’s to moving forward in life and being the best us—with or without each other.

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