1. The “Shots” Girl
I’m not talking about the cute girl who’s strolling around the bar asking if people want to buy shots. Nope—this is the girl who rolls deep to the bar with her girl friends, probably choosing to go braless and also a little overboard with the Victoria’s Secret “Love Spell” perfume, although the closest thing she’s had to love is when the bartender asked for her number. (He was also only checking to see if she was alive after slurring a request for a 14th fireball shot and then promptly collapsing.) Don’t get me wrong—”Shots” girl is a great time, and your nights out with her are always…memorable. Just think twice before inviting her to your wedding.
2. The Former Frat Bro That Can’t Let Go
We get it—you were in a frat. Those “classic” hazing stories are getting a little old, and you probably shouldn’t still be telling them when you graduated five years ago. The Ex-Frat Star excels in calling people a “little bitch” or another term that starts with a P when they refuse to drink. On the other hand, he always makes the night interesting. Since he’s all about pushing it to the limits and is always up for a challenge, something wild is bound to happen. But be careful—you might end up in a jail cell with him at the end of the night.
3. The Person Who’s Bored To Tears
Whether it’s a guy or a girl (let’s be honest—99% of the time it’s a girl), this person is constantly rolling their eyes and mercilessly judging everyone around them. This individual is SO above the bar scene. They probably begrudgingly agreed to go out and are regretting every minute of it. There’s absolutely nothing good to say about this person. We get it, you’re having a miserable time—but don’t bring down the vibe of everyone around you because of it.
4. The Sober Sally
This person isn’t necessarily stone-cold sober. They may have had a few drinks throughout the night but always keep their composure and stay aware. Unlike the Person Who’s Bored To Tears, you need the Sober Sally. This is a critical person to have, because he or she will be the one to take care of those that got a little too sloppy. Also, this is the go-to person to fill you in on the events of the night the next morning. While Sober Sally can be a lifesaver, sometimes he or she reminds you of things you would have rather gone without knowing. When you wake up relieved to see that you didn’t send your ex one single text message, this person will be getting ready for her morning jog (because they are not the slightest bit hung over), and say, “Oh you texted him six times—you showed me you were deleting them all to get rid of the evidence.” Fantastic.
5. The Angry Drunk Guy
This person usually seems pretty chill at the beginning of the night. He may even be personable and nice to talk to. However, as the night progresses and the drinks keep flowing, this person starts to get noticeably more and more pissed off. He might get rejected by some girl who he thought was a sure thing and proceed to shout obscenities. He might also start a fight with the guy at the end of the bar because he insists he was “looking at him funny.” If he doesn’t get kicked out of the bar, you’ll probably just accidentally “lose” him. Honest mistake, right?