The 6 Types of Girls I’ve Met On Tinder

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Within the years, technology has advanced so rapidly in regards to cell phones and the internet. The online dating world has exploded, and many single young adults are becoming familiar with this new way of dating. Sites like Match.com, Blackpeoplemeet.com. Christian Mingle, and OK Cupid have all been created for individuals seeking their soul mate (or one night stand). Now of course, ‘Tinder’ has come into the mix. Tinder is possibly the most shallow of all dating sites because you both have to be physically attracted to each other before you can even start a conversation and actually get to know their personality.  Anyways, the fact of the matter is, nothing ever good comes from Tinder. In this article, I list the 6 types of female Tinder-ers I’ve come across in the past year. Like I said, NOTHING ever good comes from it:

1. The “Text Message Tinder-er”:

This is the girl who has absolutely no intentions of meeting up…ever.  You will find yourself making multiple attempts within a month (or even a year) to take her out to dinner, but she will always have an excuse as to why she can’t. “I have plans with my dog that night”, “It’s my second cousins brother in laws’ birthday party that day”, “That sounds so fun but I scheduled my gynecologist appointment at the same exact time.”  In my experience with text message tinder-ers, I’ve learned it’s best to drop them after the 3rd pathetic excuse. The excuses will be never-ending, and so will your virtual relationship unless you cut the ties (through text of course).

2. The “Emotionally Unavailable Tinder-er”:

This is the girl who leaves you perplexed as to why she has a tinder in the first place. You may meet up with this girl for several dates and have a wonderful time. Perhaps it’ll cross your mind that there is a chance at a potential relationship in the works. But then one day out of nowhere, it happens. You’ll start hearing from her less, she’ll make up excuses as to why she can’t hang out all the time, and certainly don’t expect her to bring up any discussion about that “potential relationship” you thought could happen.  However, JUST when you’re about moved on, expect a text from her asking you to hang out. The minute she feels you slipping away, she’ll all of a sudden be interested in you again. These types of girls can mess with your head and unfortunately, there are far to many of them on tinder. I’ve dated several of these tinder-ers and have spent days/weeks/months analyzing what I could’ve done differently to make it work. The answer: absolutely nothing. I was doomed from the start.

3. The “100+ Miles Away Tinder-er”:

This is the girl who you usually have the best immediate connection with, only to find out she lives in Florida while you’re in New York.  You may match with them while their profile shows they are only 5 miles away, but a week and a phone number later, they decide to tell you they’ve just been on vacation. I have met up with a girl once who lived over 100 miles from me. She happened to be visiting New York and we agreed to get dinner and some drinks. The conversation felt effortless, we both were undoubtedly comfortable with each other, and even took a picture after just 3 hours of meeting.  However, we acknowledged the distance and knew it probably wasn’t going to work out (which it didn’t). It seems so unfair that the best ones have to be so far away.

4. The “Desperate and Clingy Tinder-er”:

This is the girl who throws herself at you (and on top of you) at the drop of a hat.  She’ll send you nude snapchat pictures on the reg before you even get a chance to ask her what her last name is. She’ll text you nonstop, which may leave you wondering if she actually has a life. She’ll agree with everything you say in hopes of pleasing you. Basically, this chick is scary. Chances are she stalks you, and it began the moment you regrettably gave her your phone number and she typed it in the Google search box for further information. She has been single for a while now and finds you intriguing for some reason or another. When you begin to distance yourself from her, you’re doing yourself a disservice because she’ll just want you even more. Upon my experience with a couple girls of this nature, I have learned one valuable lesson: Don’t be so quick to give out your number.

5. The “Heavy Baggage” Tinder-er:

This type of girl is charming right off the bat, until you find out she has just gotten out of a 10 year relationship. It’s almost impossible for any real chance of a future with this type of girl, because her baggage is surely to decant over onto you eventually. In my experience with these types of girls, I always assume it is the attention from me that they like. Many girls jump straight to tinder after a breakup in hopes of finding someone who can fill some sort of missing void in their lives. These girls lack independence, are often immature, and have a lot of work to do on themselves. Stay away.

6. The “Hoes in Different Area Codes” Tinder-er:

This girl is the Devil, herself. She will treat you like a Godsend, as well as the 15 other people she is secretly talking to. She will whisk you off your feet with her charm and you’ll fall head over heels for her. It’s not until you’re completely sucked in to the charisma before you find out she’s talking to a multitude of individuals just as extraordinary as she made you feel. In my experience with these types of girls, the minute your intuition tells you she may be playing you, show her how the coach would do it.

Overall, tinder is the worst. So WHY do so many of us have it? Because we hope and pray that there is a 7th type of female out there in the tinder world that isn’t a deceptive, creepy or outlandish bitch? Maybe so, but in the meanwhile, I will continue swiping these 6 types of female tinder-ers to either side of the screen with a wary grin on my face.