Stop Blaming Yourself For His Leaving — You Did Everything You Could

Unpslash / Crown Labs Agency

You did everything you could have.

You lifted him up, when all he ever did was bring you down.

You saw past his past, when all he ever did was repeat yesterday’s mistakes.

You swallowed down his “I’m sorry’s” like vodka that burned your heart instead of your throat, when all he ever did was refill the bottle time and time again.

You gave out “get out of jail free” cards like candy on Halloween, when all he ever did was roll three doubles in a row.

You stayed, even when you shouldn’t have.

His eyes were enough to turn your smile into a reflex, so you stuck around even when those same eyes looked at her instead of you.

His arms were exactly what you needed on that chilly summer night, so you stayed even when they held on a bit too tight.

His lips had become your prescription, so you forgot that he was what was making you sick in the first place.

His words were enough to make you feel wanted, so you took it “like a man” when he used them to put you down.

And even after everything you did for him, he left.

You can’t help but blame yourself because there must have been something that you did wrong.

You can’t stop replaying old conversations in your mind like a broken record because maybe if you would have found the right words, he would have stayed.

You can’t erase her face from your mind because maybe if you were prettier or funnier, he would have chosen you.

You can’t stop yourself from looking through old pictures on your phone because you need to find the exact moment when his love disappeared in a flash.

But maybe, the love was never there.

Because love doesn’t make you feel insecure, it accepts you for who you are.

Because love doesn’t put you second, it only has eyes for you.

Because love doesn’t fill your mind with doubts, it shows you that you have, and always will be, enough.

Because love doesn’t feel like walking on eggshells, it lets you be yourself no matter what.

Because love doesn’t look like him, it looks like you. TC mark

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