If you’re a Christian and you’re wondering “how to respond” to all the hype surrounding gay marriage these days, here are a few things to consider. I am purposely leaving out my personal political opinions on this issue.
1. The “gay marriage” issue has been a major dividing point among conservatives & liberals, christians & non-christians for many years now. I can barely remember a time before this became such a polarizing topic among my friends. I think it’s unfortunate that Christians have drawn so much public attention to their opposition of gay marriage because it has truly caused this issue to turn into a cultural war. I’m afraid Christians are fighting this war at Christ’s expense. The truth is that we have spent too much of our time condemning gay marriage and not enough time meeting people where they are at and caring for and loving these individuals.
2. Our message needs to change. All people are hearing is, “If you don’t change your ways, you’re going to hell.” Christ did not come into the world to condemn the world, and it’s certainly not specific sins that condemn us. In reality, we’re ALL dead in our sin already and deserve to go to hell. It’s only through Christ’s love that any of us have hope. I’m starting to think that reframing this message should be our first priority.
3. All this to say, I do believe that marriage should be between one man and one woman. I think this sums up my views on marriage best:
Where there is anything that’s designed, there is a designer. Whether it’s a truck, building or train — or even marriage — there is always a mastermind behind the masterpiece. God, the mastermind of marriage, also has a plan for how marriage works best. It can be overwhelming to try and understand God’s design and plan for marital love because contradicting and varying messages are everywhere: in books, magazines, movies and music. As a result, many couples fall into the trap of looking everywhere but to the Designer to find out what God intended for marriage. If you’ve tried understanding marriage through the world, there’s a better way.
4. My final thought is that this whole issue really does boil down to love. I have several gay and lesbian friends now and many of them consistently post on Facebook or say that all they want is the right to love whomever they want to love. I know that there are many reasons for people turning to homosexuality, but in my experience, I feel as though many of my friends who have “come out” in recent years are people who have been deeply hurt by people of the opposite sex or by Christians, and have turned to people of their own sex to find comfort, and ultimately, value. We have failed these people. I have failed these people. It is our responsibility to love these people like Christ loves us. We are all sinners, yet Christ loved us enough to die on the cross for us in order to save us. We must lay down our lives in the same way and point not only our homosexual friends to Christ, but everyone we meet. It really is all about love.
I hope that I have not offended any of my friends or family members with anything that I have said. That was definitely not my intention. These are just some of my thoughts on how Christians should respond to the issue of gay marriage as a whole, and how we should approach our gay and lesbian friends and family members.