To The Ones Who Need To Remember To Move On

This is a letter to a friend that I wish I could write.. Or more accurately, I wish she would really believe.

friends who need to remember to move on
Robert Magnusson

Dear friend,

I know you think you will never find anyone like him again. That you constantly question what you could have done differently to make the relationship work. I know you secretly believe he is eventually going to change his mind and come back to you again if you just live your life absolutely perfectly right now, post-breakup.

I know you think you’ll never feel better again. That some people are able to overcome and heal from tragedy, but that you can’t. I know that you’re pretty hopeless right now. And I even know that you paid a psychic who told you he is coming back and that you are meant to be together.

What I want you to know is that you deserve to move on.

You deserve freedom from your fear of running into him at the neighborhood grocery store or seeing his grandma at church. You deserve to live a life directed by you, not him. No matter if he eventually comes back or not, you deserve to start moving on now, not living in a shread of hope that he will come back and be continually disappointed every day that he doesn’t knock on your door or send you a text. You deserve to be really happy again, to fall in love again, to feel hopeful again.

I believe that you are special, that you have huge potential, and that there are things that you dream of doing that the world truly needs you to do. I also believe that you need to grow up and get organized and become an adult – all the way.

This sadness? It is holding you back from everything you’re meant to do and how amazing you’re meant to feel. Of course, we never feel 100% amazing all the time, but to be honest, the way you talk sometimes makes me a little worried that you’re determined to feel sad forever. But you deserve to feel amazing, joyful, and hopeful again, and I know you can if you let yourself.

Those stories you’ve been telling yourself? About how you’re not smart enough, pretty enough, never going to get what you really want in life, and will never make your dreams happen.. You deserve to move on from those too. Your self doubt is holding you back from being who the world needs you to be, and from who you want to be in the world.

You deserve to feel like you can take on the world and that you are worthy – just as you are.

That you don’t need a partner to have an amazing life, but that a partner is a cherry on top of the amazing life you can build.

Love, you can have all of this that I want for you so much. Let yourself grieve, but know that things are going to get better. You can move on. You can let this go – let him go, let the self doubt go. You can do this.

I’m here for you. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Samantha is a life coach, mom of 3, proud millennial, political junkie, and writer. She loves deep conversations, pretty things, & corny jokes.

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