1. Middle Of The Night Phone Calls
You’ve woken up in the middle of the night with the cold sweats because you’re having boyfriend withdrawals. Who cares that is 3am and he’s probably sleeping because he has to get up in 4 hours. You need to hear his voice and hear it now! If he doesn’t answer on the first ring, he’s clearly sleeping with another girl and there’s no way he’s going to cheat on you. You march over there immediately and bang on that front door until he answers.
2. Multiple Phone Calls A Day
Sitting at work bored? Call him. On your lunch? Give him a ring. Randomly because you feel like? Dial that number. There’s nothing wrong with calling him 43 times in one day, and there’s certainly nothing wrong with calling 28 times until he answers his phone. Also, blowing up his phone with texts messages about how much you loooove him and a bunch of heart and kissy face emoticons is also perfectly normal. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.
3. Face Print T-Shirt
A sure fire way to make sure everyone knows he’s taken is to make him t-shirts with your face on it. The bigger the picture the better. You should also make yourself one so that when you go out in public together you can be super adorable and matching. On the back you should also write the date of your anniversary so everyone can know how serious you guys are.
4. Become Best Friends With His Mom
Having your boyfriend’s mom in your corner is always a plus. Calling her up for brunch on Sundays to catch up on the latest life gossip will become second nature to you. Popping by her house with fresh flowers and home baked cookies just because you wanted to will always win you bonus points. It will only be a short matter of time before she will pestering her son to propose so you can be her daughter-in-law.
5. Tattoo His Name
Another way to let the other girls that he’s taken is to get his named tattooed on your body. If one thing is more permanent than your relationship it’s a large tattoo across your lower back with his name in a heart. He’ll appreciated your dedication and will totally get a matching one two. Twinsies.
6. Stalk His Social Media
“Why did that girl like your picture? WHY DID YOU LIKE THAT GIRL’S PICTURE?” These are both legitimate concerns and questions. He’s dating you, there’s no reason he should be looking at other girls. You’re committed – or at least you thought you were. The best way to handle this is to be irrational and call him out on it immediately. Nobody is going to get away with stealing your man.
7. Move In Uninvited
It’s been 3 weeks of pure bliss, and he still hasn’t asked you to move in with him. Clearly, he’s had a small lapse in judgment and just hasn’t found the right time to ask. The best way to approach this is to just do it. One day while he is at work, casually rent a moving company and move all of your belongings into his apartment. Also be sure to totally redecorate, it’s now your home too so go ahead and add your Beanie Baby collection to his fire mantel. He’ll be so excited that you read his mind and will probably ask you to marry him right there.
Once you’ve successfully completed these steps, your relationship will be stronger than ever. There won’t be anything the two of you can’t get through. And for that, you’re welcome.