I Regret Leaving Then, But Now I’m Back For Good

Unsplash, Brooke Cagle
Unsplash, Brooke Cagle

I’m sorry for leaving you when you needed me the most. I’m sorry for never answering your texts or calls when all you wanted to know was how I was doing.

I am sorry for treating you much less than what you ever deserved.

But most importantly, I am sorry for breaking your heart for my own selfish intentions.

I owe you the world and even more than it has to offer.

You have taken the ultimate sacrifice by taking me back into your arms but I want you to know that this time, I am not going anywhere.

This time, I am going to make it right with you. I am going to prove to you that I will never hurt you in the same ways I have in the past. You never deserved it although I am sure to say that I have.

With months of no absolute contact, I began to think.

I slowly began to realize I have taken you for granted. Not just you but your constant love and compassion for me. You have loved me much deeper than any other person I have ever known. And I have hated myself for knowing that fact.

I have hated myself for leaving you unannounced after 3 years of a strong and emotional roller coaster of love – a love that defined everything that I was. But what kind of person would I be to let this mad, passionate love go? What kind of person would I consider myself if I completely let go of the only person who I ever truly loved just because of how hard the situation was?

I wasn’t going to be the person to let this go. I’ve had enough and I am ready for anything that comes my way.

I AM going to love you more than I ever have before. I AM going to show you there is more to us than just what we choose to show.

I AM going to prove to you I love you more than you could have ever imagined. I WILL be the one to never leave you behind again.

Since you loved me through flaws and all, I will look through yours and see nothing but perfection.

I am done being afraid to love you, I am finished being ridiculed for loving you.

I will take any blame thrown my way. I will take any sacrifices in hopes that it will keep us sane. I will apologize and forgive whenever necessary. And I will fight until what I earned is what I have. I will fight for you with full force against any obstacle trying to take me down.

I have let you down time and again, but this time, I promise you, I am not going anywhere. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Part time assistant manager at a roller rink who also enjoys reading self-developmental books and writing her thoughts onto multiple pages.

Keep up with Sam on puckermob.com

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