If you think you don’t need therapy, can I please ask you something? Are you being honest with yourself? Do you truly think you have absolutely no need for therapy at all?
Please give this piece a read and let me try to prove to you otherwise.
If you had an abusive childhood with a punishing father, an overly-disciplined school, or a self-centered mother, your inner child had been through enough trauma. Our psych is forming during childhood and has no protection from the adult you who’s able to analyze and dismiss other people’s opinions or directions.
So, if our supposed caretakers neglected us or even worse, attacked us, wounds that they erected stay with us throughout life until treated through therapy. Although these wounds are ancient history, they can stay buried for decades while influencing our bad decisions and holding us back from our true potential.
Even if your parents were the most lovable people on earth, if you were bullied at school or by any other peer group, you still accumulated scars for life. Peer acceptance is one of our primal needs in childhood and these rejected kids will harbor loneliness and social dissatisfaction from an early age.
The lack of peer acceptance as a child will affect adults in many insidious ways, eating away at one’s self-worth bit by bit. You will become a people-pleaser and your negative automatic thoughts will rule your self-talk.
Admitting you had a less-than-ideal childhood is excruciating. It takes a lot of guts. But hiding behind a falsified childhood, hoping no one will notice, will do you no good.
Do you think that religion and philosophy are above therapy? I don’t have a strong opinion on this, and I don’t think the argument of what is above is important. But what I have seen is that religion has not yet helped most of you overcome your anxiety, anger, remorse, or bitterness. You pray, but you hurt other people. You are so self-centered that you can’t see the destruction that you have caused in others.
I believe religion and philosophy can make people placid. But these people have to have a basic level of mental health in order to attain peace and tranquility through religion. If your mind is on a never-ending race and your spirit is haunted by negativity, no dosage of religion alone can save you completely.
You won’t be cheating on your religion by going to therapy because it’s just like going to a doctor when you break your leg. A doctor for your mental health. This will only help you absorb your religion and other philosophies without the haze of mental punctures.
You feel that the whole world is against you. You have done so much good, but look at how the world treats you. Parents, friends, the system, the society. Everyone and everything is to blame. But there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you, you think. So why would You need therapy? You say, “Other people are the ones that need therapy.”
You want justice but you’re not prepared to do anything to ignite that justice. You want a savior to emerge and carry you to greener pastures. You bleed in the scum of victimhood.
No one is as much a victim as you think you are. You are in dire need of therapy so you can understand that this victim game is your fear telling you that nothing can be changed for the better. Fear sells you loneliness, helplessness, and hopelessness. Are you one of these true-blue victims?
Are you truly joyful? Are you happy with where you are in life now, whatever happy means to you? Are you ready to go if death comes knocking tomorrow? Or do you have unfinished business to attend to before you go? This unfinished business can be anything from a career goal to forgiving a parent.
If you are not wholesomely happy with where you are at and you have spent months in unhappy quarters, you can use some therapy to seize the day, to see what’s keeping you stuck, to understand what’s holding you back.
You say you don’t have time for therapy. You have so much to do. Did you know that making yourself busy with pointless tasks is a common tactic of avoidance? Avoidance of negative feelings that have become too cumbersome to consciously bear.
Even if you had your every second filled up by essential tasks as a new parent or a single parent, this is exactly when and why you need therapy. Your stress mandates an outlet. Although you can Google how to combat stress and try out various mindfulness techniques, there is no match for professional therapy that’s custom-made for you.
Besides, who can assure you that your childhood wounds and lack of self-worth are not heightening this stress? Besides, postpartum depression is real.
You say you are merely lonely, and you don’t need therapy for loneliness. In today’s world of online dating apps, meetups, and speed networking, are you struggling with putting yourself out there? Do you think that you deserve to be lonely deep inside? Therapy will help you work through what’s holding you back.
If you think you are perfect and there’s no need for therapy, I hate to break it to you, but sustainable perfectionism is an illusion for all. No one, I repeat, no one can attain that kind of marvel. If you’re a superstar at work, you’re probably ignoring your family. If you’re rocking both work and home, then you’re probably not living up to your true calling or you may have childhood scars that need healing.
For those of you who are fixed on attaining perfectionism, please know that perfectionism is linked to multiple mental illnesses. The cross of trying to be perfect for your parents or society is just too much to bear. The pressure is acute.
Most people, including most of our world leaders, can use a healthy dose of therapy from time to time. No one is an outlier for reaping the benefits of therapy.
Don’t let the taboo of mental health stifle you. It’s just not worth the destructive erosion in you.