Bachelor contestant Ashley Iaconetti revealed to millions of viewers that she was a virgin. Since she’s 26, this shocked those in the house and those watching. As a fellow virgin, it was great to hear that other women wait a little longer and that I am not alone in my lack of sexual experiences. But once is enough.
Ashley tarnished any respect I had for her when she would not shut up about her “virgin” status. Her continual obsession with her virginity, her overflow of tears every episode about her virginity, and her adamant dedication to make sure that everyone knew about her virginity made me want to scream, “NO ONE CARES.”
I am a virgin, and even I was annoyed at her behavior. So for all you virgins and non-virgins alike, here is why no one cares about your virginity.
1. It’s none of their business.
Unless you are dishing with your CLOSE girlfriends or planning on having sex for the first time, no one needs to know. It is between you and them. It is good to have a girlfriend to go to, and I would hope that you tell the person before you give it up to them, but random people you just met don’t need to know about your sex life. Your virginity is your business.
2. It’s not that exciting.
Spoiler alert: You are not the only virgin in the world. In fact, in Ashley L.’s case she wasn’t even the only virgin in the house! Other women, and men, are still virgins. So get off your high horse or get out of your pity party and realize that you’re not the only one.
3. Your blabbing psychs others out.
Some may be jealous, some may think you’re a freak, and some might just think it’s normal because they are one, too. Regardless, it will cause them to think about their first time and reflect on their sex life, and that might not always be a good thing. So keep your trap shut and allow others to focus on things other than your sexual inexperience.
4. Your whoring around ruins your credibility.
In the wise words of Carly, another contestant on The Bachelor, “Her mouth’s not a virgin.” Yes Carly, you are absolutely right. If you like to make out with people great, fine, awesome. If you like to hook up with random guys and ask them to rub your belly button ring (Ashley L.), that’s okay too. But when you claim that you are “innocent” and “inexperienced” yet climb into a man’s tent after three GROUP dates, people are just going to think you are immature. And they are less likely to believe you.
5. Your virginity does not define who you are.
I am a virgin, but I don’t let that define me. In fact, half the people I come in contact with probably don’t even know. Instead of defining yourself as “The Virgin,” talk about your job, your passions, your hobbies, your family, or your friends. At the end of the day, no one is going to remember Ashley L. for her freelance writing or hobbies. I bet no one even knows what her hobbies are.
Being a virgin does not define who someone is as a person, and the fact that Ashley makes such a huge deal about it on national television shows that women everywhere let their virginity, or lack thereof, turn their lives upside down. Society puts such pressure on women to remain “pure,” but that doesn’t necessarily make someone a good person. There are plenty of women on The Bachelor who aren’t virgins, yet they act more respectable and with more integrity than Ashley L. does. At the end of the day, your virginity isn’t anyone’s business, it doesn’t change who you are as a person, and it definitely does NOT define you.