Rule of thumb: Humans will miss important events in their lives to stare at you, or run away in sheer terror. Either way, it means they’re thinking about you, so appreciate it!
This past weekend, at the crowded gate before a crowded Penn State football game, I had my ass grabbed by a drunk 45-year-old woman. If you’ll permit me, I’d like to work through this by way of an open letter directed at her.
A few months ago, my girlfriend, her friend and I were sharing a drink when I expressed my interest in finding a better job. My girlfriend’s buddy told me about her cousin, a guy who works for a comedy website that I love, and who, coincidentally, used to work for my current employer. And the name (which I’m changing for this story) sounded familiar: Rob A…