According to Lindsay Lohan’s recent interview with Oprah Winfrey, I have done more cocaine than the actress who has been sent to rehab six times.
“I’ve done it 10 to 15 times,” Lindsay told Oprah. “It allowed me to drink more.”
When Oprah brought up Lohan’s interview with Piers Morgan in which the actress admitted to only doing coke 3 or 4 times, despite having gotten busted for possession twice, Lohan admitted that she had lied because she was afraid of being judged. Apparently she thinks that the public perception of someone doing doing coke only three times versus ten is vastly different? White lies, Lindsay. White lies.
Lindsay’s interview on Oprah’s Next Chapter wasn’t the raw, uncensored conversation we were hoping for. Rather, it felt like a continuation of the big pile of bullshit Lindsay has been serving the press since her breakout turn in Mean Girls. Yes, she admitted to being an addict, which is something she hasn’t really done before. (When she got busted for possession for the second time, she tweeted that her life had become unmanageable by an addiction to drugs and alcohol. She later backpedaled, however, and remained vague about her troubles. Rehab was referred to as a chance to “focus on herself” rather than an opportunity to kick a serious addiction.) But, as a whole, the conversation felt dry and unconvincing. When I think of an addict who has “seen the light”, I think of Pretty Wild star Alexis Neiers who kicked a heroin habit in 2011 and has since been candid about the low places her addiction took her to. Lindsay, on the other hand, isn’t there yet. She’s still only done coke ten times, remember?
You might be thinking, “So what? Lindsay doesn’t owe us shit. If she wants to fudge about her shameful past, then let her.” But it doesn’t work that way, not with Lindsay, and it never has. She reportedly received $2 million for the interview on Oprah’s Next Chapter and for participating in an 8-part docu series that will follow the actress as she navigates life after rehab. With the offers for movie roles drying up long ago, Lindsay is now making her living by being herself. I just wish herself wasn’t still trying to pull the wool over our eyes.
Of course, it’s hard to take someone’s recovery seriously when you hear that they’ve agreed to do a sit down interview and a reality series shortly after leaving treatment. I love Oprah but a part of me is shaking my head at her for seeking Lindsay out like this. It’s no secret that her network OWN isn’t the ratings bonanza everyone thought it would be. By agreeing to help Lindsay, Oprah is also helping yourself.
Things that curiously weren’t brought up during the interview: The legendary New York Times article that detailed Lohan’s erratic behavior during the filming of The Canyons. Dina Lohan’s infamous interview with Dr. Phil in which she appeared pilled out of her mind and very combative. On the subject of her parents with Oprah, Lindsay absolved them of any wrongdoing, which I totally understand. Admitting that the two people you’re supposed to rely on the most are actually bloodsucking vampires isn’t easy. Still, the whole thing just made me feel sad. Lindsay’s been paying her family’s bills since she was a child. It’s in their financial best interest to keep her working, even when she’s clearly sick. That kind of toxic dynamic is unimaginable to me. I can’t fathom having parents who look at you as a potential dollar sign rather than a child who needs your help.
After watching the Lindsay/Oprah interview, I was left with the impression of a girl who has yet to reach her true bottom. She admitted herself that court-mandated rehab left her feeling angry and resentful but, uh, that’s where she’s been for the last three months. This rehab stay wasn’t voluntary. In one of the rare moments of honesty, Lindsay revealed that being raised in a chaotic home had made her ill-prepared for leading a calm and healthy life. If chaos is all you know, you seek it out in your adult life because it feels the most comfortable. Above coke, pills, and alcohol, I truly think that Lindsay’s most deadly addiction is the one she has to fame and attention. She just can’t bring herself to disappear and regroup. She needs to have a front row seat to all of the drama. It feels like home to her.
Maybe I’m wrong about all of this, maybe something finally clicked and Lindsay is finally headed on a path that isn’t paved with coke mirrors. I hope I am.