5 Things That Need To Go Back Into Style

1. Wearing a Band-Aid on your cheek like Nelly

I’m ashamed to live in a world where a band-aid is something we simply use to treat a wound. For a brief moment in the early ’00s, it became much more than that when the rapper Nelly started to adorn his cheek with one to commemorate a friend who had been incarcerated. On top of making him The Best Friend Ever, the band-aid also transformed him into some kind of bizarre fashion icon. Soon enough, suburban teen girls were wearing band-aids all over their faces in an attempt to gain some sort of #NotClearOn credibility. But as quickly as the band-aids came, they went.  And in their wake lay a trail of tears and thwarted Johnson & Johnson sales. Now if people wear band-aids on their face, it’s because they cut themselves shaving or have been bitten by a rabid dog. I want that to change though. I want to go back to the joyous world of band-aid fashion. Take me there, I wanna go there. (I also would like to request to all of my friends that if I ever went to prison, they would let their faces become a giant band-aid. Agree? Love you so much, you guys…)

2. Body odor

From the looks of it, the sixties and seventies were pretty smelly decades. I can’t even look at photos of Woodstock without plugging my nose. But you know what? It must’ve been pretty awesome to get away with smelling like fried egg rolls and wet dog all the time. Exuding odors commonly found in garbage cans didn’t affect you negatively in any way. In fact, it probably boosted your popularity and got you laid a couple of times. Today we have to spend a lot of money on deodorant, laundry, perfumes and candles to ensure that we smell like a damn rainbow 24/7. I mean, can’t we all just agree to smell like crap? It would take so much of the pressure off if we all just agreed to let ourselves go at the same time. Ready, set, who’s with me?! Hello..? Honey? Not a good look for us? Okay…

3. Being a scene kid

I thought scene kids had become extinct until I went to a clothing store in the East Village and found one working behind the counter. I nearly gasped at the sight of It: snakebites, no ass in a pair of skinny jeans, a chest tattoo, questionable sexual orientation, flat ironed jet black hair and a permascowl. Yep, this person was the real scene deal. I honestly don’t know how she or he even managed to survive The Great Scene Wipeout of 2007, which happened around the time Myspace died. With the popular social networking site gone, the scene kids had lost their lifeline. They no longer had a safe space to post pictures of themselves wearing a bandanna around their neck with the caption: bESt FriEnDS MEaNs PuLlInG tHe TRIgGer <3 <3 <3. Facebook wouldn’t tolerate that kind of online behavior. They were strictly hipster. Wait, does that mean hipsters are just scene kids who grew up? They stopped listening to Thursday and matured into Grizzly Bear? If that’s true, we have a lot of closet scenesters on our hands. We have a lot of people with a #dark Myspace past. Well, well, well, consider my antenna up.

4. Being fat

We all know that BACK IN THE DA-AY-AY it was socially acceptable, if not preferable, to have a little meat on your bones. If you were curvy, it meant that you had money to eat and, unlike most other things, being rich has never gone out of style. Today the opposite is true. Being rich is synonymous with being thin. Affluent people spend so much money on things that’ll prevent food from entering their bodies. That means buying $15 dollar juices in lieu of consuming solids and undergoing procedures like colonics to literally suck food out of your body. I know this is a common complaint but I  really, really, really think I was born in the wrong era…

5. Wearing a bindi

I miss bindis. Do bindis miss me? Gwen Stefani made them popular in the ’90s and then they quickly disappeared, becoming yet another vestige of a decade past. Today if you wore a bindi, I’m pretty sure people would mistake it for melanoma. You would come up to people and they would just scream, “You need to go to a derm ASAP!” before running in the other direction. You guys, this really isn’t what Gwen would’ve wanted. Let’s all brave the judgement and start putting dots on our faces again. Maybe even next to a Nelly-style band-aid?! The wheels are always turning… TC mark

Ryan O'Connell

I'm a brat.


More From Thought Catalog

  • Aa

    I see young girls in BK sporting bindhis.

  • Nicole

    “Wait, does that mean hipsters are just scene kids who grew up? They stopped listening to Thursday and matured into Grizzly Bear?” Yes, that’s exactly what happened.

  • Nishant

    “Today if you wore a bindi, I’m pretty sure people would mistake it for melanoma.”
    It’s still worn in India. As it always was.

    • samantha

      This entire article obviously refers to American culture…

  • Anonymous

    OH YES. I have been campaigning that all hipsters are grown-up scene kids for some time now. I wish I could tell you about all the times I’ve gone home with a self-proclaimed hipster male who had a blink182 poster on his wall, behind a door. 
    I SEE THAT, DUDE. You must like “high school” music after all.  

    Or I could regale you with the Warped Tour tales of my one ladyfriend, who is hipster-est of all.

    Either way, IT’S SO TRUE. 

  • Hi

    i’ll start wearing all of that on my face when you do. 

  • MB

    I’m pretty sure if you’re white you shouldn’t be wearing a bindi period. Cultural appropriation, and all that. 

    • samantha

      Unless you’re Gwen Stefani.

    • Liam

      Please, tell me exactly what’s wrong with cultural appropriation? You know, since it has been happening since the beginning of culture and all? By everyone? The Greeks appropriated Egyptian culture, the Mayans appropriated Olmec culture. It happens, its supposed to happen, its okay. The difference is in understanding and actually appreciating the aspect you want to appropriate, versus just wanting to look exotic. 

  • Comic Insult

    Ryan will be SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYED for the bindi thing. 

  • http://twitter.com/SabidMAli Sabid Ali

    I know a guy who’s MySpace photos would show a slow progression from scene kid to hipster. It was like an urbane/relevant time-lapse.

  • Meera Shah

    ryan,ryan,ryan. i love reading your articles but c’mon, that bindi comment? not too smart.

  • http://twitter.com/tannnyaya Tanya Salyers

    Ah, don’t fret! Scene kids are still alive and well in the Midwest…

    • Guestropod

      Yeah, I was just assured by a friend when we were talking about this the other day that scene kids are still totally happening in Utah

    • MM

      fashion comes much slowly to us Midwesterners…we got to look in one of those fancy magazines from New York or LA to be what they call “hip” 

  • Guest

    If you do the math, it makes sense. HIPSTERS ARE JUST GROWN UP SCENE KIDS. But then again, Hot Topic hasn’t gone out of business. I see middle schoolers in there sometimes. BUT then again, Hot Topic sells Twilight merchandise. The wheels are a turnin indeed.

  • gu3sT <333

    The scene kid transformation (loosely interpreted):  

    watched cartoon network/ahhh real monsters 
    onto becoming “different” (didn’t like pop music necessarily)
    onto becoming “emo”
    onto becoming “scene” (was straight-edged XX, listened to Underoath
    onto becoming “indie” (death cab) 
    now = hipster. 

  • Anna

    So I wasn’t the only one who realized “Best friends means pulling the trigger” was sooooo deep? Taking Back Sunday FTW.

    Another favorite line: “The truth is you could slit my throat/ And with my one last gasping breath

    I’d apologize for bleeding on your shirt.” I used to be like, oh my gosh that is soooooo me.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=507159106 Nikki McGillicuddy

      Lol. I remember when those 2 quotes were on 9/10 of every scenesters myspace page. It was like a mix of goth and angst. Then when indie(indie as it’s seen as today) took over the gothness was subtracted. 

  • Anonymous

    BeSssTt FRiEndZ DiD YoU GEt wHAttT YoU DeSerrRvE???!?!?

  • Bee

    you really thought about that bindi comment, didn’t you -_-

  • Justagirl

    ryan, can i be your best friend?

  • Lady1

    Idk about the US but in Australia we wore bindis as a fashion thing before we knew who Gwen Stefani was. :/

  • A-W

    Hipsters are NOT grown up Scenesters. Scenesters turned into ravers, emos, or work behind the counter at Ricky’s. 

  • Meh

    I am growing tired of Ryan’s pieces. They used to be good but now he just needs to take a break, think, and write something TC-worthy.

  • MC^2

    #3 is so true it made me snort laugh from my cubicle. All of the kids from my high school that were in Taking Back Sunday ripoff bands are now in Black Lips ripoff bands.

  • PeeFace

    Scenesters all hang out at IsAnyoneUp now.

  • zzz

    can we pls bring bindis back I would def be keen to ride that wave!

  • garbagetime

    This is garbage. Be original, damnit. Really, Nelly, mysapce, and fat jokes??? This is written at about an 8th grade level…. I hope you are proud. 

blog comments powered by Disqus