Ten Reasons Why You Should Get Over Your Ex

  1. Chances are they’ve already moved on. They picked themselves up already and go through entire days without thinking of you. Their new Facebook album is pictures of them skiing in Colorado with friends. I’ve looked through all of them and they’re totally sporting an “Over it” face. In an ideal world, you’d be the one skiing the slopes of I Don’t Care mountain, but you’re not. You’re still paralyzed. The quickest way to regain feeling, however, is knowing that your ex is moving forward. You don’t want to be the one ghost haunting the relationship that everyone else forgot, do you?
  2. Mourning a relationship is a full time job. Caring is exhausting. You owe it to yourself to lighten your load by beginning the healing process. Life is not a Drew Barrymore break up movie. Put away the ice cream. You want to hurt your ex, not yourself.
  3. You find comfort in still grieving the relationship, don’t you? Holding on to their memory somehow feels comfortably uncomfortable and getting over it feels terrifying instead of a relief. Because that means they’re gone for good, that the relationship is actually over. No, you think you’re not ready for that. One more mope session please. You don’t want to be cut off! Except, hi, you need to. Becoming addicted to the grief is a scary reality and it should be incentive enough to get your ass in gear.
  4. Your friends will start to hate you. Every time you mention your ex’s name, they will roll their eyes and be like, “K, stop. This egg roll we’re eating shouldn’t have reminded you of your ex.” It’s your friends’ job to help see you through this horrible time but it’s also their duty to tell you to get the hell over it.
  5. You don’t want to hate yourself. Moping over your ex is the fastest way to get to self-loathing. You’ll beat yourself up and think you’re pathetic and lame. This kind of thinking will only get you further into the k hole that is self-hatred. Own the fact that you’re bummed while still making a concentrated effort to get out of the funk.
  6. Wanna get laid? Good luck trying if you’re still spending your nights looking at old photos of your ex on your computer and crying yourself to sleep. No one will want to tap that when you’re in that state of mind. And the ones that do are creepy and like to advantage of people in a vulnerable state. You’re not going to get screwed when you feel screwed.
  7. You can stop relating to cheesy songs about heartbreak and sexist rom-coms. You don’t want to ever relate to a character Katherine Heigl has played and you shouldn’t ever listen to a Dashboard Confessional song and think, “Hmm, Chris Carraba was on to something here.”
  8. You can feel empowered again. Realizing that you’re a strong person who can overcome a mountain of shit is liberating. You spend so much of our time feeling powerless and letting certain people/things control our moods. The moment you reclaim that power and discover that you can heal yourself will be life-altering.
  9. You can run into your ex in public without feeling like you’re going to die. You can tell them, “Oh, I saw those pics of you skiing on I Don’t Care Mountain the other day. I went there last week! Byeeee.”
  10. You can have the beauty of hindsight. Now that you’re no longer in the throes of the relationship, you can actually see things for what they were and be like, “J/K, it wasn’t that great.” TC mark
image – Maj Adev

Ryan O'Connell

I'm a brat.

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  • http://www.facebook.com/sarah.n.knutson Sarah N. Knutson

    #10. Soooo true.

  • NJ

    I really enjoyed this. :) it’s so true.

  • Aaron Johnson

    My ex became my best friend. Friday she went on a trip with some family friends and I realized I’m still in love with her; she came back with a boyfriend (7 years older than her). I have a lot of mixed feelings over this, but the timing is fantastic.

    • Guesty

      Seven years isn’t, like, that big a deal.  

      • Guest

        Actually, in some cultures, it is.

      • Guesty

        The culture Aaron Johnson hails from?

      • oy

        Really? Have you ever tried dating a 19 year old when you’re 26? lullz

      • Guesty

        No, I’ve only been the younger person all the friends are horrified by.  

      • Guesty

        But also I only mean that it isn’t ~scandalous~

      • Yup

        Dated a 25 year old while I was 18 and it was the most harmonious relationship I’ve ever been in.

  • ANG

    “K, stop. This egg roll we’re eating shouldn’t have reminded you of your ex.”

    I LOL’ed

  • Grateful Anonymous

    I needed this. Thanks, Ryan.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

    so. over. it.

  • ShanLeigh

    “You don’t want to ever relate to a character Katherine Heigl has played…”

    QFT.

  • lisafortuin

    you always say the most perfect things. x

  • A.

    “Screaming Infidelities!”

    Jk. You’re right. The moment I start thinking Dashboard was on to something is probably when I should get a (new) therapist.

  • A.

    “Screaming Infidelities!”

    Jk. You’re right. The moment I start thinking Dashboard was on to something is probably when I should get a (new) therapist.

  • A.

    “Screaming Infidelities!”

    Jk. You’re right. The moment I start thinking Dashboard was on to something is probably when I should get a (new) therapist.

  • coffeeandinternets

    You had to go and reference Chris Carraba.  Cuts so deep.

    Are we including Further Seems Forever in this example or are we just talking Dashboard or

  • Personal best

    before I met you, I was on IDC mountain. Now I’m on WTF, ILY mountain…forever.

    • Ryan O'Connell

      what who is diss

      • Guest

        A GIRL! OH NOOO!!

    • Ryan O'Connell

      what who is diss

  • Victory

    LoL! “This egg roll we’re eating shouldn’t have reminded you of your ex.” I can picture this sene with me saying ” This egg roll reminds me my ex, She looked just like this egg roll,!!!!”

  • http://twitter.com/jesswalshx Jess Walsh

    “Oh, I saw those pics of you skiing on I Don’t Care Mountain the other day. I went there last week! Byeeee.”
    hahaha best.

  • Guest

    What’s wrong with Dashboard Confessional?? 

  • Sophia

    This is what I needed to hear but didn’t want to. I hate this article, but I need it. Thank you.

  • Sophia

    This is what I needed to hear but didn’t want to. I hate this article, but I need it. Thank you.

  • skylar

    Is it weird that I already know the first thing I do when me and my boyfriend break up is come on to thought catalog, click the love&sex tab, and then go through every break up article there is on here? They’re all so relevant, and I guess with a lack of supportive friends, this is what will get me through!

  • vee

    who is this about LOL

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steven-Timberman/922794 Steven Timberman

    But that egg roll DID remind me of her!

    Hate to see you angsting so much over this Ryan. There are always a bunch of reasons we should get over someone, but its not like there’s some fool proof “30 days to forgetting” handbook out there.

    But, I will say that whenever I’ve been thinking heavily about ex-girlfriends from the past, its because my current situation was never that exciting. Make a change. Or something. Or make a change, and then cry yourself to sleep. Its cathartic, or so I hear.

  • fran

    i wish this wasn’t so painfully accurate. but thanks :)

  • http://bangbangcanary.com/ Cat

    “Realizing that you’re a strong person who can overcome a mountain of shit is liberating.”  Yes!

  • http://bangbangcanary.com/ Cat

    “Realizing that you’re a strong person who can overcome a mountain of shit is liberating.”  Yes!

  • http://twitter.com/FeHaciente Fernanda Cortes

    Number 8 is the most important of the list- for me- “You spend so much of our time feeling powerless and letting certain people/things control our moods. The moment you reclaim that power and discover that you can heal yourself will be life-altering” I couldn’t ever say this better! thanks!

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