5 Things People Like To Do When They’re Angry

1. Cry

I remember one of my best friends telling me that he used to get in fist fights with other boys when he was in middle school. And that afterwards, no matter who won, they would both just cry. Something about the image of two testosterone-ridden pubescent boys sobbing always stuck with me. It’s as if they were old enough to get angry and hurt each other but still too young to know that they couldn’t cry about it. Crying is an appropriate response to anger because it’s something you do when you’re at a loss with your feelings. A lot of anger is unexplainable, a lot of is irrational, and a lot of it feels just plain silly. So you cry when you have nowhere else to go with it. “I don’t know what to do so I’m going to just cry tears of rage. I’m going to cry for everything bad that I feel inside of me right now.” Anger and sadness are inextricably linked. In a way, blubbering like a little baby seems like the most honest and healthy reaction to being pissed off.

2. Suffer memory loss?

So here’s a weird personal story for you. Last Christmas, my mother, my sister and I were kicked out of my uncle’s house. We packed our bags and drove from Palm Springs to Hollywood in the middle of the night and the whole thing was terribly dramatic. The reason why any of this happened is uninteresting. I mean, have you ever had a narcissistic gay uncle in a family full of emotional retards? That shit is not fun. What was interesting, however, is that after all of the fighting went down and my uncle had had some choice words with my mother, he claimed to have no memory of the horrible things he said. It’s like he blacked out. At first, I thought he was lying. How convenient to suffer from rage amnesia but apparently that’s a thing—getting so angry that you disconnect from your memory. Um, that’s terrifying. I bet people have been murdered in these kinds of rages and when the person comes to, they have no recollection of any of it. Isn’t that what happened when Ozzy Osbourne strangled Sharon? Whatever. I’m just happy I no longer have to go to Palm Springs for Christmas and watch my family argue over a piece of chocolate and talk about the weather.

3. Say things you don’t mean

If you’re angry with someone, you run the risk of saying some evil things to them—stuff that would even make you gasp afterwards. “How did those words come out of my mouth? I’m appalled but I mustn’t show it! I have to continue hurling insults at this person!” Your capacity for cruelness quadruples in a fight and you’d be surprised to see how far you’re willing to go. Anger seems similar to horniness—it’s a feeling that completely overtakes your personality. You do shocking things in order to satisfy the feeling and then when it’s gone, you’re just like, “Oh shit. Did I just do that?” You have blinders on. I swear, I never feel more powerless than when I’m horny or pissed off. I just feel like a five-year-old baby animal. It’s….humbling, I guess. You don’t feel like you have any control over yourself. You’re just a species who belongs on the Animal Planet.

4. Drink

There is nothing more terrifying than an angry drunk. Whenever one of my friends has been like, “I’m pissed. I need a drink!” my mind fast forwards to 4 a.m. when they’ll be wasted, angry, and beating up a taco truck. No thanks. I don’t claim to have the most healthy coping mechanisms but I do know that any altered state is a no-no when you’re feeling like crap. Being a sad drunk is preferable to being an angry one though because you just embarrass yourself. If you’re angry, you run the risk of getting into a fight, which is something I just can’t/won’t/don’t do. If I sense some trouble is brewing, I will run for the hills before I defend someone’s honor, especially if it’s over something as silly as “DID YOU EAT MY NACHOS?!”.

5. Destroy shit

People like to destroy shit when they’re pissed. Look at Woodstock ’99 or Fred Durst from Limp Bizkit. It’s how he made his millions. Anger leads people to punch walls, throw things, the whole works! I feel like I missed out on this whole phenomenon. Breaking things would just give me anxiety and make me more angry. I mean, I cried when my dresser from IKEA fell apart.TC mark

image – Wikipedia

Ryan O'Connell

I'm a brat.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

Read Here

More From Thought Catalog

  • kaelly

    i feel you on the last point. my ikea bed fell apart when i was sleeping in it last summer and i spent the rest of the night/morning sobbing, convinced that it was a metaphor for my life.

  • erin

    you forgot to mention vancouver canucks fans losing the stanley cup in this article

    • erin

      and how they went bat shit crazy last night

    • http://twitter.com/no_cazador hunter ray

      I think that was covered under “Drink” and “Destroy shit”

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

      because when people get angry they 'mention the vancouver canucks fans losing the stanley cup in this article' right?

    • Jordan

      Good example

  • http://twitter.com/no_cazador hunter ray

    True, drinking is a bad idea when you're angry. But getting real high when the world is pissing me off has always served its purpose pretty well.

    Or I just yell out loud and clean my kitchen.

  • http://twitter.com/kyleangeletti Kyle Angeletti

    Passive aggressive comments on the internet.

  • http://twitter.com/jkymarsh J. Ky Marsh

    Picture of Fred Durst over the article caption made me LOL before I even clicked.

  • Tory

    I'm really bad about breaking shit when I'm angry. In my life I've broken (that I can remember) two remote controls, my computer or keyboard at least four times, my phone, school textbooks, an alarm clock, a flashlight, a porcelain trash can which I had thrown at the floor, a shower rod, and I don't even know how many pencils and pens. Not to mention throwing food around which I then had to clean up. It's something I've accepted and begun to learn to control about myself–break the $3 flashlight, not the $400 computer–but it's still a problem.

    It terrifies my boyfriend. He grew up in a house where fights of this kind *between people* (I have never been violent against a person in anger. Not how I roll.) were common occurrences, so any sign of uncontrollable rage violence makes him nervous. I've tried to explain to him that I wouldn't hurt a person, but it still freaks him out. I'm learning to control myself some more because of that.

    Basically, if you break shit when you're mad, you are definitely not alone.

    • Kev

      Omg I hear ya! I hate this uncontrollable rage. I feel like I cant even work on my truck or anything cause if it doesn’t go right, its like a fire starts under me and the firs kt thing I see is usually what takes all the trauma. Tonight was my $350 double din radio in my truck. Broke the glass with my fist and just twisted the flash/thumb drive and messed that part of the radio too. My truck hasn’t been running in 2 weeks and I just wanted to drive and hear my bass you know. The littlest stuff can trigger the biggest outburst :(

  • Elle

    I am such a crier. I always burst into tears when I'm mad or in a fight. 
    I've hypothesized over the course of my life that, as a female, it might be some sort of subconscious (maybe even instinctual) defense mechanism. Perhaps my female instincts are telling me “men don't want to hurt women”, so that's the reason I automatically cry whenever I am in a fight and/or feel threatened.I mean the military doesn't put female soldiers in active combat positions bc some male soldiers will just jump in front of the women to save/protect them, so maybe my subconscious knows that too.

  • http://twitter.com/thisiswilson MWil

    When I get angry I bottle that shit.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=512038806 Adam Green

    You should have posted the Vancouver hockey riots instead of Fred Durst…

  • eferf51
  • freddipass

    On a serious psychological note, multiple sources of research have found that “acting out” your anger actually makes it worse.  So, you're onto something when you say breaking things would just give you more anxiety and make you more angry. The best things to do are distracting things. That will be $50.00.

  • http://twitter.com/nestevian888 Brooklyn

    I’m smart enough not to break stuff when I’m mad!  In the past when I’ve had fist fights (loonnng time ago) I did always cry right afterwards… not in front of my opponent of course lol

  • http://www.facebook.com/iamahmad Ahmad Radheyyan

    I’m constantly taking my blind rage out on internet atheists for some reason. Don’t ask me why. They’re like my virtual punching bag.

    • Sushi Girl

      You are an awful person.

    • Sushi Girl

      They are not doing harm on you, respect their beliefs as you want other people to respect yours.

    • Jacob

      You are a horrible human being.

    • Lewis

      Jacob is wrong because you’re worse than a human. You’re a sub human bitch. Ol dumbass bitch

    • Alex

      A bitch’s bitch. Just a bitch.

    • Jerome

      I used to clean sewage pipes in Atlanta and you remind me of the shit ridden scum I used to clean up there. And don’t even get me started about the sewage

  • John

    I get REALLY pissed off at inanimate objects when they don’t function like they are suppose to. I threw a 500.00 camera across the room because it was saying BUSY when the perfect shot I had been trying to get was ready.  I can’t work on things because I get so pissed at whoever designed the piece of SH#@ that all I do is cuss the whole time at it. I wish I knew why I get so mad at stupid stuff like this. I have a son now and don’t want him to do the same.

  • Buezike

    weird? reading this actually helped me feel a little better, which is a lot coming from how pissed i was….uhgg, but i’m still angry…darn it!!!

  • Cg

    Might explain why my roommate does what he does.  If he doesn’t work out every day, he builds up too much energy and becomes EXTREMELY annoying, gets pissed off at everything, and likes to bang on the walls and make noise.   I actually socked him in the stomach one day when he was really annoying, which shut him up real quick.  He swore that he’d get me back but hasn’t since. 

  • Pie

    When i’m angry i tend to break things, but like ridiculously huge things … like desks support beams chairs tables walls trash cans small cars (tip them over and dent them up) … its a bad problem, but i don’t get THAT angry very often. Although a random hole in the wall or something stabbed into something else happens in my household … i don’t know why i somehow do those things when i’m angry. If i tried when i was calm then i probably would take a long long time or not have the ability to do it at all. :3

blog comments powered by Disqus