The Funniest Voicemail You’ll Ever Hear

Why am I always late to seeing YouTube viral videos? This audio clip of a voicemail has already received over a million hits. Why? Because it’s hilarious and real. A drunk girl describes her shameless crush to the wrong boy and the whole experience is excruciating and awkward and hysterical to listen to.

Do you ever wonder sometimes though that these internet memes are actually just hoaxes? I mean, how easy would it be to leave a fake voicemail on your friend’s phone? You pretend to be drunk, say funny things, and voila! We have an “authentic” slice of life moment on the internet! Whether this particular viral video is real or not is, I guess, irrelevant. It could be real. It has happened to you. You have done something kind of like this. Technology: Major source of shame and humiliation since, like, 2002. TC mark

image – Duchamp

Ryan O'Connell

I'm a brat.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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  • valentine-kitchenson

    Biggest fail of a troll known to YouTube.

  • Amanda Viers

    Drunk people aren't funny.

    • Sonia Ali

      Yeah I don't really think so either.

  • Dr. Carey

    It doesn't matter if it's real, it only matters that we believe it's real… It's a simulated experience. Whether it's real or not, you know there are a thousand others per day that we'll never be privy to which are equally funny, funnier, or slightly less funny. It's a reasonable facsimile, and on the internet, real and fake get homogenized into pure entertainment.

    Furthermore, imagine it's definitely fake! It's still a pretty bizarre type of prank, with specificity to the different places of employment she mentions. If this were an improv sketch it would still be funny. The only way it wouldn't be funny is if someone said, “hey let's try to make a viral video” because our brains can contextualize us out of enjoying almost anything.

  • statusandapager

    idk i think this is cute

    • Amanda Viers

      if you like overzealous stalker drunk types.

      • Noah Tourjee

        I think this is cute TOO, and I do not like overzealous stalker drunk types. Maybe you're just getting defensive because you've left this voicemail before!

      • Amanda Viers

        um…she just met the guy THAT night and he thought she was creepy enough to give her a wrong number. Apparently, I'm not alone. P.S. I don't leave voicemails for anyone accept my mother because I hate listening to them.

      • Noah Tourjee

        except ;p

      • Amanda Viers

        nice catch.

  • anonymouse

    I think it's cute/funny too, and I'm not into stalker types. Drunk people are funny, because they are absurd.  I'm sure this girl isn't like this when she's sober.  Amanda Viers, get a sense of humor.

  • JaejeB

    She kind of sounds like Tina Fey's Sarah Palin when she says “your little shirt and your little pants” and “you have all my contact information.”

  • J in DC

    Hmmmm, RYAN ….  are you THE Ryan she left the message for?  If so, I can't imagine why you wouldn't want to call her back.  Think of the EBay (that's “E-B-A-Y”) deals you could get ….

    It was hilarious, though!

  • madgie

    Does she work in jamba juice and ebay?!

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