Things People Like

People like Fridays because it means they won’t have to answer to anyone but themselves for the next two days. It means they can potentially be surprised by something or someone, and not be so damn bored. The monotony is temporarily suspended and they think this could be the weekend that they find their spontaneity and regain some quality of life. Friday is also the day new movies are released.

People like having a vice, whether it’s chocolate or a big fat line of cocaine. They like doing something they know is bad for them because it feels good to be bad, don’t it? We secretly like rules so we can break them. Imagine if we had the absolute freedom to do whatever we wanted. People would just end up knitting, drinking tea, and minding their p’s and q’s. No taboos = no fun.

People like to hit some sort of rock bottom so they can remerge with a new appreciation of what it means to be happy. They’ll be able to say things like, “I was in a dark place for a sec, but now I feel so much better,” and have solace in knowing that they were able to improve and heal. Oh, that reminds me. People like to feel proud of themselves and others. They like a comeback from someone who has been completely down. It’s inspiring and it shows vulnerability.

People like pop songs. If they say they don’t, they’re liars and that’s okay. People like them because they ‘re deceptively simple and easy to relate to. They make you feel a part of something and they make you believe that you’re participating in a larger cultural moment. You can be at a party with people you hate and put on “Party In The USA” to make everything better. “I don’t speak your fucking language, but I do speak Miley.”

People like love in any incarnation. Romantic comedies, ballads, love stories, tabloid gossip about celebrity relationships: They love it all! They love the love. If you can explain to people why they’re not being loved and offer up a solution to their woes, you will be very rich. Why? People love being guided in the right direction almost as much as they love the self-help section in a bookstore.

People like to “like” things on Facebook. I’m not really sure why this is. Could you tell me?

People like being contrary. If something becomes insanely popular, its value is immediately dissected by fat balding men who work in record stores and dismissed.

People like Mean Girls because it’s a really funny movie.

People like feeling like they “get it.” The “it” is indescribable and vague, but it’s usually shared with close friends. “I’m so happy that you just get it, you know?” Yeah.

People like orgasms and sex and being held and feeling worthy of being loved and laying in bed with someone on a late sunday morning and sweet text messages and happy happy joy joy.

People like money. Maybe even a little too much because they’ll kill for it. They’ll risk it all for a buck.

People like their parents. If they don’t, they wish they could. They wish they came out of someone else’s vagina, someone who isn’t insane, manipulative and an overall shitty parent.

People like taking pictures in front of buildings when traveling in foreign lands.

People like to say “thank you” when they really want to say “fuck you.”

People like any period of history they didn’t come of age in. Particularly the ’60s.

People like to look good. People like to feel smart. People like to feel right.

People like Tom Hanks. TC mark

image – jwnerd

Ryan O'Connell

I'm a brat.

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  • dip

    “The sky is blue.”

    -Ryan O'Connell

    • ChrisL

      Well, yeah… but somehow he makes it interesting. Don't you wish you could?

      • dip

        This is interesting because you recognize what he makes reference to and because of the half-assed jokes thrown in. This is the family guy of writing.

      • ZaneEatsWorld

        I'd agree that Ryan does sometime fall back on writing deceptively “simple” column ideas, but I'd say the quality of his writing itself makes up for the sometimes uninspired topics.

  • Jake Ringwald

    You think this might be instead things you like?

  • http://twitter.com/raystraight Ray Straight

    While the thumbs-up “like” button is tempting, I must expound further that I really like this.

  • http://www.behance.net/clifwith1f clifwith1f

    People like to read good writing and nod along at how much it hits home. People like to comment on stories in hopes that people will agree (i.e., “Like”) with them so they feel like they're part of something.

  • brononymous

    I hate Tom Hanks.

    • Guest666

      dude…srsly? shitloads of commercially/critically successful movies, seems nice(if a little smug sometimes), genuinely funny, and one of the only dudes in hollywood still married to the same woman after decades.
      BIG. FORREST GUMP. SPLASH. CMONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

    • http://www.behance.net/clifwith1f clifwith1f

      How can you hate a guy who, after winning multiple awards including 2 Oscars, will still do stuff like this?

  • Joy J.

    I like anything Ryan O'Connell writes.

  • http://twitter.com/kyleangeletti Kyle Angeletti

    People like to say “thank you” when they really want to say “fuck you.”

    …my whole week

  • PERFECTCIRCLES

    My vice is Peanut Butter Sandwich cookies from the proto-fascist Girl Scouts of America. I ate an entire box last night.

    You can watch a video about this cookie (and others) at http://www.girlscoutcookies.or….

  • http://brianmcelmurry.blogspot.com/ Brian McElmurry

    People “like” things on fb, so there friends will see it and maybe read the link.

  • http://twitter.com/nanabuuui Anna B

    I have the fattest crush on Ryan O'Connell because of his writing <3

  • http://twitter.com/and_susan Susie Anderson

    it's true, I really really like Tom Hanks

  • shoehorn

    i like how there is zero context offered
    i found this article thought provoking because of that..

  • Jordan

    thanks for this, because i can't relate to people and therefore have trouble understanding why they like the tings they like.

    seriously, no snark intended!

  • ryan chang

    my favorite tom hanks movie is The 'Burbs. i have not met one person that didn't like tom hanks. or pop songs.

  • ohshafiqa

    but i don't like tom hanks.

  • Tommmmmm

    people also like playlists.

    • Tommmmmm

      playlists>albums

  • Tom

    'People like to be contrary.'

    Can't say I agree with that..

  • Joy J.

    Oh, I also like leaving comments on Thought Catalog articles and seeing how many people “like” them.

  • Alex Allison

    Read whilst feeling a vague sense of disappointment. This had a lot more potential. I feel it was a lazy effort and I disagreed with much of what you had written. Aphorisms are all well and good, but a sustained argument makes for a far more readable article.

  • Kathy

    People like to “like” things on facebook because it's like winking at someone. You don't have to make a full, public communication about it, and you don't have to come up with an intelligent or even coherent comment on it. You don't have to define your feelings about this thing in a verbal way, which might not quite do justice to them. You just have to click a button and everyone who sees it knows that this thing struck home with you on some level — and people with privileged access to your inner life know what level that was. Which is another fun thing about it. It reminds the people you're close with that you share some kind of knowledge that a lot of the people seeing the Like don't share.

  • Mish

    i like dick

  • revan

    i like to lie

  • case

    without hesitation, i clicked on the 'i dont like this' button at the end of it.

    somehow, i feel bliss and guilt at the same time.

  • rose

    I like lamp. no wait. I LOVE lamp.

  • http://twitter.com/Popipol Popipol

    Its not who you are its what you like!

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