Things People Like
By Thoughtis
People like Fridays because it means they won’t have to answer to anyone but themselves for the next two days. It means they can potentially be surprised by something or someone, and not be so damn bored. The monotony is temporarily suspended and they think this could be the weekend that they find their spontaneity and regain some quality of life. Friday is also the day new movies are released.
People like having a vice, whether it’s chocolate or a big fat line of cocaine. They like doing something they know is bad for them because it feels good to be bad, don’t it? We secretly like rules so we can break them. Imagine if we had the absolute freedom to do whatever we wanted. People would just end up knitting, drinking tea, and minding their p’s and q’s. No taboos = no fun.
People like to hit some sort of rock bottom so they can remerge with a new appreciation of what it means to be happy. They’ll be able to say things like, “I was in a dark place for a sec, but now I feel so much better,” and have solace in knowing that they were able to improve and heal. Oh, that reminds me. People like to feel proud of themselves and others. They like a comeback from someone who has been completely down. It’s inspiring and it shows vulnerability.
People like pop songs. If they say they don’t, they’re liars and that’s okay. People like them because they ‘re deceptively simple and easy to relate to. They make you feel a part of something and they make you believe that you’re participating in a larger cultural moment. You can be at a party with people you hate and put on “Party In The USA” to make everything better. “I don’t speak your fucking language, but I do speak Miley.”
People like love in any incarnation. Romantic comedies, ballads, love stories, tabloid gossip about celebrity relationships: They love it all! They love the love. If you can explain to people why they’re not being loved and offer up a solution to their woes, you will be very rich. Why? People love being guided in the right direction almost as much as they love the self-help section in a bookstore.
People like to “like” things on Facebook. I’m not really sure why this is. Could you tell me?
People like being contrary. If something becomes insanely popular, its value is immediately dissected by fat balding men who work in record stores and dismissed.
People like Mean Girls because it’s a really funny movie.
People like feeling like they “get it.” The “it” is indescribable and vague, but it’s usually shared with close friends. “I’m so happy that you just get it, you know?” Yeah.
People like orgasms and sex and being held and feeling worthy of being loved and laying in bed with someone on a late sunday morning and sweet text messages and happy happy joy joy.
People like money. Maybe even a little too much because they’ll kill for it. They’ll risk it all for a buck.
People like their parents. If they don’t, they wish they could. They wish they came out of someone else’s vagina, someone who isn’t insane, manipulative and an overall shitty parent.
People like taking pictures in front of buildings when traveling in foreign lands.
People like to say “thank you” when they really want to say “fuck you.”
People like any period of history they didn’t come of age in. Particularly the ’60s.
People like to look good. People like to feel smart. People like to feel right.
People like Tom Hanks.