Gather ’round readers and let me tell you a little story about a 22-year old girl named Cassie. As a resident of beautiful Coral Springs, Florida, Cassie spends her daze going to the beach, textin’, smoking crack cocaine and oxycodone, ignoring her 3-year old child and prostituting her body for some cold hard cash. Yes, that’s right. It’s one of those stories.
Before we get started, let’s have a pop quiz. According to the traditional Intervention narrative, Cassie was what kind of baby?
- A. A crack baby.
- B. A laughing, smiling baby.
- C. Rosemary’s baby
If you answered “B”, you would be correct! Cassie was a laughing, smiling baby. Yup. Happy. Baby. But in the land of Intervention, nothing stays good forever. In Cassie’s case, her laughter quickly turned to tears when she was abandoned by her mother at the age of three and left in the care of her father Dominick —a real party boy who was more interested in marrying random girls than tending to his child. Uh-oh. Cassie is screwed. Bye Cassie!
When she was thirteen, things really took a turn for the Daddy Dearest. After discovering that Cassie was smoking pot and being a general pain in the ass, her father sent her to a behavior modification camp in Costa Rica, which Dominick assures us looked good online. But according to Cassie, it wasn’t good. In fact, it was kind of scary. After spending six months there, the camp was shut down after dealing with some student riots (isn’t that pretty telling of the inhumane conditions?), and alll of the kids were then shipped off to Jamaica to attend a place called Tranquility Bay, which as it turned out, wasn’t tranquil at all. According to Cassie, she was living la vida Brokedown Palace in a glorified prison. She was forced to eat with her hands, beaten, and treated like a wild animal. Kids would drink harmful chemicals just so they could be sent to the hospital and get the opportunity to call their parents and be like, “Mom. Dad. I’m a celebrity, get me out of here!” After Cassie was away for a year, a journalist from The Washington Post called Dominck and informed him of the horrible conditions at Tranquility Bay. Dominick—who apparently had been living in a state of blissful ignorance—promptly took her out.
I can’t believe a place like Tranquility Bay actually existed. It sounds like something your parents would pretend to send you to if you were acting up. “If you don’t stop it, we’re sending you to a camp for bad kids!” Unfortunately, Cassie’s dad actually did send her to bad girl camp and now she’s a crack cocaine addicted prostitute! Given all the horrible things that happened to her in Jamaica, it’s understandable that Cassie holds a lot of resentment and anger towards her father. Dominick, meanwhile, is so overcome with guilt for what he’s done to her (and quite frankly for what he hasn’t done} that he enables Cassie’s addiction by paying for her to stay in some fleabag motel.
So this is Cassie’s life today. She does drugs in her motel room, texts constantly, calls people on the phone and sells her body for drug money. To make the story even more tragic, she has a 3-year old son who she rarely sees because he lives with the baby daddy’s grandparents. Cassie’s obviously super depressed. She’s tried to kill herself twice in the last three months. Things just aren’t looking good. I think it’s time for an intervention.
At the pre-intervention, Candy tells the family that Cassie’s been prostituting herself for drugs, which makes her dad instantly burst into tears. She then tells Dominick to stop enabling Cassie and everyone in the family nods their head furiously in agreement. Time for a pop quiz again! What do enablers typically win on Intervention?
- A. A lifetime of misery and regret
- B. Enabling pants by A.P.C.
- C. Treatment at the Betty Ford Family Center!
If you answered “C”, you would be correct! Gold star.
Now to the main event. Cassie arrives at the intervention and seems unsurprised by everyone being there. “I knew this was Intervention.” That’s what everyone has been saying this season! This show’s popularity is a blessing and a curse, I tell you.
Cassie’s attitude quickly turns dark and she starts sobbing and screaming at everyone. At one point, Candy actually loses it too and says, “You need to get clean so you can be the mother you were meant to be!” Ugh, the “Mother” card. Hates it. Cassie kicks the camera crew and her entire family out of the room except for her dad and aunt. They tell her that she’s going to die, but it’s clear that a suicidal person doesn’t really care about that. Cassie ultimately rejects treatment and runs off into the cold harsh daylight.
But wait! A week later, she accepts treatment. All is good again. We then see Cassie in rehab doing yoga and shit. She apologizes for being such a bitch, but it’s like “We get it. You were tortured in Jamaica. Do you, babe.” She’s been clean since October 12, 2010. Her father hasn’t gotten treatment at Betty Ford yet and it’s disconcerting, but let’s focus on the positives. At least Cassie is no longer a hooker.