The Five Original Hipsters

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Historians believe that the advent of the Hipster occurred close to ten years ago. According to official-looking documents, they arrived in Williamsburg, Brooklyn tired, hungry, and ready for their close-up on Last Night’s Party. But if you look closely, you’ll see that hipsters have actually been around for much longer than that. Throughout the last couple decades, they’ve appeared sporadically as an omen of what was to come, lurking in the corners of our favorite films and television shows. Here are the first five hipsters to ever appear…ever.

1. Freddy Krueger in Nightmare on Elm Street

Freddy Krueger may have been a homicidal maniac and a child murderer but he was also a tragically misunderstood fashion icon. As a child, he would wear his usual chic ensemble of a fedora, striped shirt and black skinny jeans to school only to be met with cruel taunts on the playground. The kids would call him horrible names and Freddy would just cry and cry and cry. When he would get home from school, he would quell his sadness by reading old issues of Vogue and creating amazing mood boards. At night, he would pray to God and say, "Please, take me to New York City so I can hang out at the Chelsea Hotel and be with people like Patti Smith and Viva." As we all know though, Krueger never got to see the bright lights of the big city. After a kid at school teased him for wearing a vintage Dior cardigan, he became incensed with rage and killed him, effectively becoming the murderer he is today. Even though he went down a dark path, it's important that Freddy Krueger be remembered for what he really was: a pioneer for hipster rights.

2. Kimmy Gibbler in Full House

Let's face it: Kimmy Gibbler probably had a lot to do with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's fashion metamorphosis. I can imagine them staring at her with their young beady eyes on set and studying her clothes. Mary-Kate would get out her Etch-A-Sketch to do some designs and Ashley would stop her and say, "No, Mary-Kate. We're not ready." Mary-Kate would then nod and pretend to understand while Ashley would breathe a sigh of relief. Today, their style is eerily similar. Like the twins, Kimmy dressed like she took a hit of acid everyday and chased it with "Fun" juice. Her insanely-colored tights, inexplicable hair accessories and loud lipstick shades just scream Nylon magazine dunked in irony.

3. Billy Bibbit in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

I've actually never seen this movie before but this dude Billy Bibbit is so channeling the "now" with his haircut. From the looks of the screenshots, he appears to play a mental patient which isn't that surprising. Crazy people had that haircut then and they certainly have it now. But maybe Billy wasn't actually crazy. What if he was just misunderstood like Freddy Krueger and was outcasted to the fringes of society for his eccentric style and devil-may-care attitude? I guess I should just see the movie before I start to make wild accusations but it seems likely.

4. Elaine Benes in Seinfeld

These days, it's hard to tell where the '90s end and the hipsters begin. The New York Times recently did a whole feature about hipsters dressing like Elaine Benes and it was so spot-on. The floral dresses, the socks peeking out of the shoes, the hair; it's all so uncomfortably real and modern. There are some blogs that are saying that George Constanza is also a hipster but that's just a dirty cruel lie. Hipsters aren't ready to be fat and balding and I'm not sure if they'll ever be. Well, unless they work at a record store.

5 . Rosemary in Rosemary's Baby

Carrying the spawn of Satan has never looked so fashion-forward! Mia Farrow's androgynous pixie cut and pastel spring dresses make her right at home in the pages of any Marc by Marc Jacobs look book. It's weird because throughout the whole movie, she's seriously ill and freaking out because she's carrying the Devil's baby, but she always manages to pull it together with her ensembles and look tres effortless.

See? I told you. Murderers, mental patients, pregnant ladies: they were all hipsters before the term was even coined. They were planted here by some mysterious figure to prepare us for the ironic apathetic future. Isn't that sweet?

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