Christians Give Amazing Dating Advice. What I Just Said Is A Lie

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Thank God (heh) that Christians mate for life because they’re really bad at the whole dating thing. In this instructional video, an “I’m not a regular Christian, I’m a cool Christian!” kind of guy gives tips on how to talk to women. One of the pointers involves asking a girl in motorcycle boots if she’s in a gang. You know, because she’s wearing motorcycle…boots? Cut the crap, mister. We know what a real Christian conversation is like!

Christian Guy: Hey there, pretty lady! Gosh, you look pretty badass! What do you like to do for fun?

Christian Girl: Um, I like to eat Starburst and go over to my friend Kimmy’s house and maybe go out for a hot fudge sundae!

Christian Guy: Woah, I love hot fudge sundaes! Are you in a relationship?

Christian Girl: Yeah, actually. You might know him. His name is Jesus?

Christian Guy: Amen to that, sister! I’m with Jesus too! Not in a gay way. We’re just bros. Do you like Dane Cook?!

And you get the rest.

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