A couple of days ago I was at Starbucks with one of my friends and she asked me: “Why is it so difficult to forgive those who hurt us?” Honestly I didn’t knew what to tell her so I just told her that it was because we’re human beings and have feelings. When someone hurts us, it’s not easy it’s not easy to forget that.
Her question stayed in my mind and a couple of days later I realized my answer was really poor. It’s true, we’re humans and we’ve got feelings, but what really makes us struggle with forgiveness?
Let’s face it, pride is one of our greatest enemies. If someone hurts us, our pride blinds us from forgiving him or her. Pride makes us hate that person and not being able to think clearly. Forgiveness disappears from our vocabulary. Pride is based on “I.” I did this, I did that, I’m right, I was nice with him, I helped her and that’s how she’s thanking me for it? We focus so much on our side of the story that we’re unable to see the whole picture.
Sometimes we do want to forgive someone, but pride itself doesn’t let you. It keeps telling you that you’ll be a fool by forgiving and that you’ll probably end up being hurt again. But pride can be defeated. Humility it’s your greatest weapon against pride. It’s okay to be proud of your achievements and all the good you’ve done, but do it with humility.
Also, pride stops us from asking for forgiveness. It clouds our reason, so we think we’re always right. That we are the ones who have the right to be mad when we hurt someone or vice versa. Sometimes we’re so deep in the “I’s” and our stuff that we forget that forgiveness is love.
So, what does love has to do with forgiveness? To forgive is to love and to love is to forgive. When a guy forgets his girlfriend’s birthday or anniversary, why does she forgives him? Because she loves him. We forgive others because we love them and our love for them is greater than our pride. Love beats everything. No matter how mad or sad we might be, love is what makes us give a step forward and forgive or ask for forgiveness.
Show others how you forgive. If someone hurts you, forgive him. Give him a hug and tell him how much your love or your friendship means to you and how you don’t wanna lose him for a stupid thing.
Always forgive your friends and when you hurt them ask for forgiveness. They’re your greatest treasures so don’t argue for something that it’s just not worth it. Don’t put yourself into a situation where you might lose them.
Forgive your family. Yes, they’re not always very supportive and families aren’t perfect, but they love you (even if they don’t always show it). Be who you are, that loving guy or girl who want to find happiness in this life and doesn’t hold grudges on anyone. If you learn to forgive and forget, you’ll see how life starts getting happier and easier than before.