Most People Think What Happened To Our Local Baker Is An Urban Legend, But I Know The Gruesome Truth

Obviously, I’m not the only one of my kind out there.

There are many beings that possess similar abilities. No, not all of them brew tea. Not all of them are women. Hell, not all of them are people. The world is a strange, mysterious place full of odd things.

And some odd things happen to be very territorial.

I became aware that someone had encroached on my territory almost immediately… probably because the attack was instantaneous.

One morning, I was brewing Black Dragon Pearls Black Tea. As I watched the little pearls unfold in the hot water, the leaves twisting and writhing in a dance commonly called the agony of the leaves, I began to notice an odd sheen to the water. I had barely a moment to register the anomaly when the leaves began to transform.

Into grasshoppers.

Grasshoppers. Disgusting, filthy, pathetic grasshoppers. I screamed as my hands began to tremble around my glass teapot. I itched to throw the glass across the room, but I knew it would shatter and the grasshoppers would be free… and once they were, they’d come for me. So, instead, I waited for several long minutes in agony as I watched them boil to death. Only when I was sure that they were all did, did I take the teapot to the trash bin outside and throw the whole mess away, slamming the lid in equal parts fear and anger.

If this seems odd, then allow me to elaborate – to my kind, grasshoppers are a curse. To you, they may seem harmless. But we know better. We know what hell they bring.

Someone had snuck into my teahouse and contaminated my sanctuary. This was not a prank or even a warning. It was more than a thread. It was a deadly attack, one heavy with intent. Somebody wanted me dead and gone.

And if I didn’t put a stop to it, I would be.

beetlejuice

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