Date a girl who likes French fries. Date a girl who always chooses the combo with fries. She offers you her Zinger Burger every day because of the large order of extra fries. Date a girl who has problems with the container that just fits 34 pieces, who can give you as many reasons why McDonald’s french fries are the best, and who can single out Waffle fries from Boardwalk and Steak fries in her sleep.
Find a girl who likes French fries. You’ll know that she does because she’ll keep asking for extra ketchup every other minute. She’s the one who is anxiously looking for the longest fries in the container kept in front. She’s the one who melancholically walks out of the restaurant after thulping a king size curly fries with dipping sauces. You see the weird chick who feed herself a handful of fries at a time like there’s no tomorrow. That’s the true French fries lover. For them the Greasy and salty thin long potato fries are the most favorite culinary pleasure.
She is the girl you come across at Pizza Hut demanding the bearer a bag of fries as an add-on and then again at Coffee Day enquiring whether they can replace the chocolate cookies with Wedge fries. If you take a peep at her fries you can see the ketchup spread all over the plate with a layer of selected fries sullied with hot sauce on top. This is the true mark of a French fries lover – fries are not meant to be had just by dipping the ends into ketchup. A thin layer of ketchup need to be all over it like the kid in the Surf Excel Ad. Sit down. She might not talk because she just refilled her mouth with the maximum number of fries or may be even more, but she might stare at you and then your hands to check whether you carry an extra bag of fries to be shared in case the one she has gets finish.
Ask her if she liked her fries. Ask her if she thought the fries could have been better with some Sautéed Portobello and some mild Barbecue sauce. Buy her another bucket of French fries.
Let her know what you really think of the Pint O’ fries at Fountainhead. See if she prefers topping the fries with egg Burji or Mayonnaise. Understand that if she says she understood how the ‘French’ in ‘French fries’ came or if she’s just saying that to appear knowledgeable. Ask her if she knows Ray Kroc and pray she doesn’t say “Who?”
It’s easy to date a girl who likes French fries. She understands there are highs and lows in a relationship and won’t compare you with random people. Just like how the salt and masala is not throughout the whole bag and like how one fry is different from the random next. Get her unexpected gift which surprises her like the extra-long fries you encounter in some fries bag. Three to four gifts over the course of a month will do well, since a bag of fries comes maximum with three long fries. Get her those Truffle fries, Portillo’s fries and her favorite regular fries at McDonald’s. Sprinkle attention on her like the salt settled on top of the fries. Let her know that you understood French fries are love.
Make French fries yourself on her birthday. Call up your mom in advance and ask her how to light the stove. Get the frozen fries from the nearby store and lick the bowl together.
One fine day she’ll handover you a lunchbox full of French fries and that’s the day when you know she had you in her mind all these days frying deeply in a simmer flame called love. Take the risk of eating the whole what she’d given to you even if it tastes horrible. Because then she’ll learn the truth. She, the girl who likes French fries.
You’ll propose her at ‘Fries Corner’ Koramangala. Or at EFC Thrissur. Or very casually at Dominos Juhu, while she orders French fries as a starter. You’ll have a great wedding where you’ll serve your guests with Shoestring fries with Caesar Salad instead the desserts. And vow to share hot fries with her forever. Except if you get gas trouble. In that case you better stay away from potato fries. Because you know why!!
Grow grey with the girl who likes French fries. As old as having three times French fries daily will allow you. Have thin long kids, name them strange and get lost in the savory experience. Watch her introduce your kids to Steak fries with Soy chicken strips and to Twisty fries with Cheddar cheese at the same time. Stay home and order two large bags of Waffle fries in hot summer. Enjoy the vegetable soup with fries and make love around the heat of the deep frying pan on cold winter nights. And go for long walks to shed those extra pounds in spring.
Date a girl who likes the French fries because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the crispiest life imaginable. If you can only give her the monotony of Chocolate Doughnuts, Baskin Robbins, Taco Bells, you’re better off alone. If you want a spicy mix of happiness and sorrows with a sprinkle of love all above, Date a girl who likes French fries.
Or better yet date a girl who likes Pav Bhaji.