Is there a god? It’s a debate that has raged on for ages but today, I offer proof that there we are alone: the king and queen of nonsense songs, Owl City and Carly Rae Jepsen, have collaborated. How is this proof you ask? Simple. The universe is an infinite and chaotic place that holds mysteries we can’t even begin understand and yet somehow, two tiny living vessels, made up mostly of carbon and water, have found each other in this great void. With their powers combined, they have created a series of audio waves that will create a black hole of stupidity large enough to end life on earth. If there were a god, he would have put an end to this nonsense a long time ago.
But alas, here we have “Good Time” by Owl City and Carly Rae Jepsen. Since this song is slowly ending life as we know it, I thought I’d take some time to see if there’s actually any meaning b3
“Woke up on the right side of the bed/ What’s up with this Prince song inside my head?”
I don’t know if Owl City means he woke up on the right side of the bed in the literal or metaphorical sense but whatever the case, I’m just surprised that he actually has a bed and that he’s not just making Garageband loops from his mom’s futon. Also, I’d really like to know which Prince song it is that Owl City is boogeying down to in the morning because it’s one thing to disco dance along to “I Wanna Be Your Lover,” but it’s an entirely different (and Silence of the Lambs-type creepy) thing to gyrate to “When Doves Cry.”
“Hands up if you’re down to get down tonight/ Cause it’s always a good time.”
It’s the non-explanation of what’s going down and where that comes off as fantastically creepy. Maybe he’ll tell us later in the song what actually is going down, where it’s happening, and what is always a good time but my common sense tells me he won’t.
“Slept in all my clothes like I didn’t care/ Hopped into a cab, take me anywhere/ I’m in if you’re down to get down tonight/ Cause it’s always a good time.”
Sleeping in your clothes means you don’t care. There’s no “like” in that situation. Trust me. Owl City, I know you don’t have a grasp on societal norms because your music sells that information to us free of charge, but there’s two people on this planet that can get in a cab and say take me “anywhere” without getting tossed out. Their names are Ryan Gosling and Willy Wonka.
In case anyone’s wondering, he has yet to tell us just what it is that’s always a good time, we just know it’s going down tonight. That means it could be anything from duckpin bowling to an Eyes Wide Shut Party. Hell, it could be both.
“Good morning and good night/ I’ll wake up at twilight/ It’s gonna be alright, we don’t even have to try, it’s always a good time.”
Anyone who says something like, “Don’t worry, you don’t even have to try, it’s always a good time,” and then adds that you’ll “wake up at twilight” should be arrested because that person is pedaling crystal meth.
“Freaked out, dropped my phone in the pool again/ Checked out of my room, hit the ATM/ Let’s hang if you’re down to get down tonight, cause it’s always a good time.”
Carly Rae has become unhinged, ditched her phone in a pool, and made a massive withdrawal from her bank account. She’s definitely pedaling crystal and getting paranoid that the DEA are onto her. This is just a theory, but it’s a theory posted on the internet so you should just believe it.
Hey Carly, if you dropped your phone in the pool, how am I going to call you maybe? You’d be amazed how much I hate myself for making that joke.
The chorus blasts on with the both of them screaming “woah,” almost as if even they are surprised they’re getting away with recording this garbage. And just as a general update, we still don’t know exactly what is a good time.
“It doesn’t matter when, it’s always a good time then. It doesn’t matter where, it’s always a good time there.”
Oh good, that solves it. Every situation is a good time no matter what the details. “That sounds perfectly reasonable,” said no stab victim ever.
Then Carly Rae and Owl City kidnap a bunch of kids and make them sing the chorus over and over again. So was there any meaning behind this song? Nope, just a good time.