To the casual viewer of Saved by the Bell, Zack had one major love interest. For those of us who never missed an episode, Zack’s list of love interests was much more elaborate. Who was his greatest love interest of all time? Here’s a countdown from the worst to his ultimate match.
OK so maybe this one is a bit of a stretch, but the episode where Zack dressed up as Bambi and went on a date with Screech was one of the most bizarre things the gang at Bayside ever did. A Screech/Zack relationship would never work.
22. Jessie Spano
Dating your best friend’s ex who is also close friends with your ex? There really couldn’t be a more terrible pairing. Plus, Jessie is a feminist and Zack a womanizer. That’s why Jessie and Slater never lasted.
21. Lisa Turtle
Screech has been Zack’s pal his entire life and for every moment of that friendship Screech has been in love with Lisa. You just can’t do that to him, Zack. If you two are out of Screech’s life the only thing he has left is Kevin and if that has to turn sexual, it’s going to quickly get really weird.
As much as they made Louise look like a nerd, she was still so cute! The only problem is that Zack was only pretending to like her to get more votes for his awful school song. You missed out on a good girl, Preppie.
19. Nurse Jennifer
Can you believe after all that chasing of Kelly, Zack was willing to dump her for a shot at the school nurse? That’s not only foolish, but the relationship would be illegal. Get your life together, Zack.
18. Penny Belding
Nothing better than a date started on blackmail from your principal, is there? They could have had a nice date, but just like Bonnie Raitt said, “I can’t make you love me if you don’t.” Is that the first Saved by the Bell/Bonnie Raitt reference? I hope so.
Ginger wasn’t just sort of an airhead; the girl could hardly function. I’m not sure how she was passing her classes or getting sufficient grades to graduate. Her relationship with Zack didn’t last long, as she could barely carry a conversation.
16. Tori Scott
BOO TORI GET OUT OF HERE NO ONE LIKES YOU! Tori wasn’t a bad person, but when you abruptly eliminate Zack’s lifelong obsession and bring some random leather jacket in to replace her, fans are going to get upset. Thanks for not proposing, Zack.
15. Wendy Parks
Wendy won a date with Zack during a date auction at Bayside. Imagine the movie Taken, but with Slater instead of Shannon from Lost. Zack wanted some random blonde girl to win instead of the plus sized Wendy so he spends the entire episode trying to avoid her until finally realizing that everyone has feelings? No one ever accused Zack of not being shallow.
Zack and Andrea made a great couple while he was visiting Hawaii. Props to Zack for still being interested in her after finding out she was a mom (You’re growing up, Zack!) but can you imagine Zack as a teen stepdad? No way.
13. Laura Benton
Laura was the homeless girl that Zack dated for a day. I’m not sure you can base a relationship on letting someone stay at your house and sing songs because you don’t want them sleeping at the mall, but he gave it a shot. We never saw Laura again. Did she die? We need answers, Zack.
12. Nicki Kapowski
Kelly’s little sister had a huge crush on Zack, which must have made things incredibly awkward at Zack and Kelly’s wedding years later. Zack does everything he can to make Nicki dislike him, but to no avail. Not with that hair, Zack. Eventually the two “break up” but that definitely would have made for an interesting relationship a few years down the road.
Here’s a classic case of Zack’s lies costing him a great relationship. I mean, as great as an 8th grade relationship can be, that is. Zack had lied to Karen about his age over the summer and now they’re at the same school. The relationship almost cost his friendship with Mikey, but nobody ever liked him anyway.
10. Joanna Peterson
Both Zack and Slater pursued Joanna so heavily that it almost ended their friendship. I’m not sure why, as she never seemed that interested in either of them. The best thing that came out of Zack’s interest in Joanna had to be this ridiculous fight with Slater.
9. Rhonda Robistelli
Why was Zack so uninterested in Rhonda? She was fun, outgoing, and even told him that her parents were out of town so they would have the house to themselves. That sounds like a checklist of things Zack would be looking for in a date. I hope Rhonda is very happy somewhere. You deserve it, baby girl.
8. JB Slater
Zack decided to go after Slater’s sister who we had never heard of and would never hear of again after her episode. You’d think the students at Bayside would at least mention their siblings, but no. I would have enjoyed seeing Zack and Slater eventually become relatives, with Zack marrying his sister, but unfortunately she disappeared into the Saved by the Bell dark place along with Rod Belding, half the member of the Bayside ROTC, and Jessie’s brother Eric.
Melissa was the really sweet girl that Zack met on Teen Line and then treated like a child because she was in a wheelchair. She obviously has some emotional problems or she wouldn’t be calling Teen Line, but Zack never really takes the time to get to know her, as he’s too busy coordinating wheelchair basketball games. On a side note, the greatest moment in Saved by the Bell history may be during the wheelchair basketball game when Slater jumps out of his chair for the jump ball and everyone has to explain to him that if you’re in a wheelchair you can’t jump. Really, Slater?
6. Kristy Barnes
While most of Zack’s hasty relationships ended with break-ups, Kristy and Zack finished their episode on a high note and yet still, she disappears forever. If you don’t remember Kristy, she was the wrestling sensation that saved Zack from a bully when they were on a date. I could have watched an entire season of Zack and Kristy going around town and wrestling local jocks.
5. Leslie Burke
The College Years may not have been that memorable or even that good, but early on Zack started a relationship with Leslie. It was nice to see Zack growing up and having a more mature relationship in this next step of his life. Of course that didn’t last long, as Kelly came back onto the scene and blew the whole thing up. You just can’t get between Zack and Kelly, but Leslie was a nice change of pace.
Way back when Zack was just a lad, he made a bet that he could kiss international superstar singer Stevie while she visited Bayside. Turns out she was related to Miss Bliss which would have been common knowledge if Wikipedia had been around. Zack and Stevie have a great conversation at Miss Bliss’ house, even if Zack has no idea it’s her. I would have loved for their relationship to blossom. Can you imagine a Stevie and Zack Attack combined tour?
3. Stacy Carosi
The only relationship Zack had that lasted anywhere near as long as Kelly was Stacy at the Malibu Sands Beach Resort. They were such a great couple, which made it so hard to see their relationship come to an end as summer wrapped up. Plus, Mr. Carosi would have made an incredible father in law. He ran a beach resort!
2. Danielle from The Attic
Zack met Danielle and convinced her that he was a fellow college student at USC. This led to them bumping and grinding all over The Attic, which was, of course, a club where minors weren’t allowed. She was attractive and fun, but what made this relationship so great is that it led to Zack and the gang busting Jeff making out with another girl on the dance floor. Rot in Hell, Jeff.
1. Kelly Kapowski
Who else would be #1 besides Kelly? Zack kept a cardboard cutout of her under his bed for crying out loud. In real life, relationships that start in junior high school don’t normally translate to marriage, but in Saved by the Bell it would have been blasphemy for it to end any other way.