7 Things I Learned When My First Love Left Me

Danielle Drislane
Danielle Drislane

Only some people are lucky enough to spend the rest of their lives with their first loves. But as we know that life goes on, we learned a few things from each of our experiences. Here is a list of a few things that I learned when I lost my first love.

1. Nothing lasts forever.

Lets be honest. Nothing lasts forever. Those childhood memories that you still cherish and remember,that favourite place that you used to visit all the time with you family and friends,that one favourite show that you grew up watching,that one person that you always loved and wanted to be around..they are all gone now. Everything is different. You have your own place now,you have your own children and you have your own favourite place now that you love visiting where you can spend some quality time with your family.Its a fact of life that things ARE going to change eventually. You can’t go back to the past and be a child again.You can’t go back to your favourite place as a child now.You can’t watch your favourite childhood show now and enjoy it as much as you did as a child.You can’t return to your childhood again. And you don’t get to be with that ONE person you loved so much because things are different now. All you get to keep are the memories.In short,nothing lasts forever.

2. The length of the relationship does not matter.

Maybe you were together for years or maybe you were together for only a couple of months or weeks.The length of the relationship does not matter. You could be head over heels for that person for years or only for a few months.But that does not make the heartbreak any easier. At times,it seems impossible to move on. You can miss them and love them and yearn for them. Take as much time as you need and don’t stress about it because you WILL move on and stop missing them eventually.

3. First heartbreak changes you.

Do you ever wonder why you are the way you are now?That is because pain changes you. It makes you a different person.It is only natural to have your guards on after having your first heartbreak.That one person who promised to be with you forever is gone now. And if someone does come along and tries to know you and actually care about you,you push them away. You are not that person who used to smile all the time and cared about people so much because you realized that they leave you anyway. The positive aspect of having your heart broken is that you learn things that you could have never learned in any other way. It makes you strong and helps you to get up on your feet without the help of anyone else. So smile because now you are a much stronger person. You’re different but in a good way.

4. Your first love is not always the right person for you.

Instead of crying and ranting about them all day,think if they were really right for you.Were you two people who were interested in the same things and had the same life goals or were you two people who were completely different from each other? Could he or she really be a part of all the dreams that you had for yourself and were you completely sure about having them as your life partner? The first person you love does not neccesarily mean that they are right for you.There are plenty of other people out there that you have not met yet who can be your potential life partner. Perhaps they are even more fun and have many of those qualities that you always wanted your life partner to have!So go out there and get to know your true soulmate.

5. You get to know yourself better.

Alright.Use this time that you have with you now, wisely. Get to know yourself better. Since you don’t have to worry about the guy or girl that you loved anymore,you can focus on your own life completely.Do the things that you always wanted to do.Set new goals for your life and try to achieve more.Focus more on your studies and take care of your health. Pamper yourself. Try new things. Meet new people.Make new friends.There are SO many other things to do in your life. A guy or a girl is not every- thing! Improve yourself and try to recognise your faults. Be better than you were yesterday. Your life should not revolve around just one person. Go out and have fun. As Christina once said in Grey’s Anatomy,”He’s not the sun,you are”.

6. You can’t speed up the healing process.

It’ll take weeks or months to finally be okay again. Sometimes years! But you cannot speed up the healing process. It takes time. It is not easy to mend a broken heart. It is okay to be scared and it is okay to cry. Do not bottle up your feelings. Let them out. Cry when you can no longer hide your tears. Cry as much as you want to, but remember that it does not matter how much you’re hurt right now because you WILL heal and you WILL be okay again. Just have faith in time and get through it.

7. Moving on is hard but you will.

If you’re wondering if you will ever move on and get over that person, I am here to tell you that you WILL. Moving on is not easy. Letting go of your first love is one of the hardest things that we have to do in our life. They will always hold a special place in your heart and perhaps you will never be able to forget them but it doesn’t make you any less capable of loving again. You WILL find someone one day and they will love you as much as you love them. And you’ll have all your dreams come true and you will also be glad that you could love again because nothing is more amazing than loving the right person because this time you will be sure that they will always love you back. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

A reader and a writer. And someone who wants to be better than she was yesterday.

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