Being Predictably Unpredictable Is Harder Than You Think

I’m supposed to meet Mr. Right at the intersection of expectations and reality, but at the present moment, I am totally fucking lost.
Photo provided by Rina Nath
Photo provided by Rina Nath

When I attended The Howard Fine Acting studio, Howard would say, “An audience will always be drawn to children or animals, why? because there is an element of excitement with unpredictable behavior, movement & reaction. Therefore, as actors, you need to remain unpredictable when performing.”

So, how about when we’re off stage & no longer in front of the camera…

Are unpredictable people far more interesting? I suppose I would agree that erratic behavior, the not knowing of what he/she is thinking, acts that are random or seemingly out of the blue keeps us guessing and can all be rather alluring … Yet, I believe there should be a cap, a limit to that rationale. I mean how long do you want to date someone who is random. What’s the cap? And if you have to put a cap on it, that clearly means you’re playing a game.

Is it really about who plays the game well, or do you keep it real?

I dated this guy who is active in the community and extremely busy professionally. I noticed when he was tapped out, he became rather predictable & asked the question, “So, tell me about your best friend.” It was a genius move! He could then sit back, exhale, enjoy a glass of wine, decompress, didn’t have to say a word and phase out while listening to the answer. LOL, because what woman doesn’t have a best friend who she could go on and on about, right? But…I’m not like most women. I recognized he was tapped out and decided to utilize the last of his energy towards something far better than talking about my friends.

I know I should be predictably unpredictable… yet that is far easier for me to do on stage. In real life, I’m painfully transparent.

Dating new faces, being a step ahead of the game, the ability not to mix up who said what, or texting the wrong guy with a text meant for the right guy, remaining optimistic that in the end this effort might be worthwhile, keeping an open mind/heart to the possibility of love, not allowing myself to become jaded or affect my actions and to understand that even after giving it my all, there is always a possibility of being rejected and passed up for another woman. Perhaps the most challenging, is reminding my heart to calm the fuck down and not to get too involved until his heart has cordially invited it.

Sometimes, I wish I could live, laugh, love and thrive in a script, on set, in front of a camera with an ending, I can be ready for.

My future husband is out there somewhere, pushing a pull door, I just know it ;) Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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