To The Girl I Used To Be

Jiří Wagner

I found myself thinking of you tonight as I reminisced about my childhood with my best friend. I began wondering what I would say to you if I had the chance to give you advice for your future, my current life. I also wondered what you would say to me.

First off, I would start by saying that you are beautiful and perfect in every way that you have been made. I would tell you to hold your head high and ignore the criticism you will encounter from strangers and the people close to you. Never let those words become your inner voice. You are worth far more than that. Know your worth. Trust your intuition. If something does not feel right, then it isn’t. Do not let people take advantage of you or your kindness but never stop caring and being kind. These soft characteristics about you make you who you are.

I would also tell you to follow your heart and your passions.

Never give up on your dreams. Be brave. Take chances. Meet new people. Travel.

See the world but never forget that you have a home to come back to when the world knocks you off your feet. Trust me, dear girl, you will never feel more free than when you are wandering a strange city.

As you grow, you will change physically. You will become taller and curvier. Do not hate your body. It was made specifically for you. I know that the media and society will try to tell you what is beautiful. Do not listen to them. One size does not fit all. Embrace yourself and love who are you. That is the most important thing you could ever learn.

I know that all you want is love. You will spend years searching for someone who will truly love you the way you love him.

Do not give up but do not confuse someone’s lust for love either. Unfortunately, you will learn as you go that some people use the phrase “I love you” as a way to use and manipulate you. Be wary of this sweet girl. If you are going to love, then do it whole-heartedly. Never go into a relationship if you are unsure. Know what you want and go for it. I must tell you, your heart will be broken many, many times. You will spend countless nights crying yourself to sleep. It’s worth it. Life isn’t truly worth living if you don’t feel something.

The pleasure is worth the pain. Trust me on this one. I also want you to know that sometimes love doesn’t work out. You will meet someone who will completely turn your life upside down. He will make you feel how you’ve never felt before. You will love him more than you ever thought you could love anyone. It doesn’t work out. Call it bad timing, he wasn’t ready, whatever it may be. He will be one of the great loves of your life, your first great love actually. Go for it anyway. This relationship teaches you a lot about yourself and love in general. All of the pain from this relationship is worth it. Never give up the hope that someone is out there waiting to find you. Your hopeless romantic side helps you carry on.

Keep being a dreamer, a believer, a writer.

Your creative outlets will help you escape the craziness of everyday life. Writing will set your soul on fire. Putting pen to paper allows you to express yourself in a way that you can’t do in a verbal conversation. See this through. This is one of your greatest assets. Do not be afraid to share your work with the world. I know you will hold it close to you. It’s a part of you but share it. This is one of the most intimate parts of your soul. Let it shine.

Lastly, I would tell you to be strong. Be strong in every way possible. Do what is best for you.

At times throughout this crazy life, all you’ll have is yourself to rely on. Work hard. Love hard. Follow through. Be fierce. You are worth all the stars in the sky. Brave the stormy weather but continue being soft. Do not change who you are for anyone and do not let others negatively change you. I wish you all the best darling. I hope this life becomes all that you dream it will be.

This is what I would say to you… TC mark

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