For as long as I can remember, I’ve struggled with insecurities. I’ve struggled with this feeling of not being enough. Not quite good enough. Not beautiful enough or intelligent enough.
“Beauty pageant material? Nah, I am not tall or slim enough.”
“The perfect summer body? Well, that’s still loading!”
“Being a good mom, wife, and sister requires super powers. I don’t match up.”
The list goes on.
What I have come to realize is that I AM ENOUGH. I am who and what I need to be. I need not measure myself against world views of other people, my past experiences, or even situations that I find myself in. Yes, especially those ones I did not voluntarily partake in.
When we give them room to grow, insecurities can cripple us. They manifest, leaving us weakened, disengaged, and disempowered. We lose control of the very life we are trying to keep intact. Wandering in the wilderness on a quest to find who we are, we lose ourselves.
Most of my insecurities were born from childhood experiences, and without realizing it, I’ve dragged them into adulthood. The thing about insecurities is that they are very much linked to limiting beliefs we impose on ourselves. In most cases, these stem from our perspectives and not necessarily from reality.
Yes, limiting beliefs and insecurities can distort reality. For example, a loved one will affirm us in a certain way, but because of our insecurities and limiting beliefs about ourselves, we tend to unconsciously go out of our way to discredit or downplay the affirmation.
So, to counter this, I’ve used the time during the COVID-19 lockdown to consciously work on myself. I am now at a point where I have successfully identified my limiting beliefs and their sources. This awareness has brought an indescribable freedom to my soul. I must admit, though, reframing some of these ideologies has been undeniably challenging, but it has been a fruitful journey.
A journey I would encourage you to undertake, if you haven’t already.