5. You stretched her out. Stretch marks. Ew. Your fault. Break out the Mederma.
1. “My relationship with cats has saved me from a deadly, pervasive ignorance.”
What if we had a class together sometime? What if we sat next to each other during a lecture and he asked if I wanted to study for the midterm together? What if we got burgers with our friends, went to parties together, and recounted the tales in class the next Monday?
1998: Selling Beanie Babies on eBay
In the past couple of months, a pair of studies has given new strength to the vegan argument — to a group of people who have, it seems to me, been right all along.
I’m an adult now, alone in New York City, and flowers are what adults do.
She is the big sister I never had, and she has shaped me more than any other person outside my family.
Like a teacher, a mother’s influence extends forever.
You think about the things you will miss. The people, the discussions, the plethora of parties and friends, the books, some classes. The proximity to talent. The strong sense of pride and belonging.
How much do looks matter in every day life?
Oberlin College. This small college in Ohio has a student body that is 94.6 percent hipster (provided you exclude the conservatory). — The Hipster Handbook.
My mom has believed in me since the moment I flew out of the womb to greet the daylight.
Because above all else, you will regret that you didn’t love people when you had the chance.
Although not overly involved in the Catholic Church, I consider myself a religious person.
Is the Universe trying to play some tricks on you? Do they have a plan or do they randomly pick on people?
I fight to be as normal as I can, to be an equal among the rest of society.
Don’t you hate those people who talk about their diets all the time? They go on and on about how they’re “so into lentils right now,” and how they’ve stopped eating gluten because it’s bad for everyone, and how they’ve never been to a Taco Bell and want to keep that streak alive.
Pies are like the perfect comfort food: you eat it warm, and each heated, gooey bite reminds you that in the end every thing will be ok. Who needs boys or plans on Saturday night when there is PIE.
I don’t love you anymore because I’m not important to you and you give me nothing. Maybe saying that makes me a selfish person but I no longer care.
A kiosk salesman made eye contact with us and motioned us over. As a human being, it’s a natural reaction to walk toward someone who is beckoning.
Last Monday, I was able to attend the official RuPaul’s Drag Race finale party at the XL Nightclub, Cabaret & Lounge in New York City, where it was revealed that due to her old-timey comedic quirks and overall sweetness Jinkx Monsoon was crowned America’s next drag superstar.
I was living on my own after ten years of marriage and my kids were visiting me every two weeks I didn’t know what to do with them. I didn’t have a door on my bathroom. I had girl problems. I had money problems. And now I had two tiny people who I needed to entertain.
Here we are, looking at each other not look at each other.
We begin where every great story should start: brunch.
1. Use the word “dude” (“bro”, “bud”, and “homie” also come to mind) liberally.
You can take up to three hours to watch a 30-minute episode because you keep wandering over to Wikipedia to read about Hitler for a little bit, and no one can tell you that it is ruining their precious viewing experience.
20-somethings had no part in creating this unholy fiscal disaster from which you 40-somethings are now trying to detract attention.
I never eat anything unless it’s organic and has truffle oil on it and is being served in a boho chic restaurant! Look, here’s some pictures of the fig casserole I’m about to eat!
Talking to a man can be very complex, and if you do it wrong, you might just mess up!!! Here are some basic rules for talking to your man.
4. This show is giving side-chicks hope.
It was hard to realize that I was the only person I knew in New York that didn’t really want to be here; harder still to book the flight and make the plans necessary to move away.
I’m convinced that anyone who figures out how to focus on the things that are within their control while forgetting the stuff they can’t has won life.
Mercedes-Benz’s #Untamed is a unique digital photo installation in Paris inspired by user-submitted Instagram photos.
She was my waitress at some restaurant and I jokingly left her my business card, not thinking she’d actually text me.
I propose that we start throwing tampons at the men who insist on talking about our bodies like they are monsters who lived under our beds when we were five.
These children’s slowed-down reactions to tasting foods for the first time are very cute.
A new collection memes of Ryan Gosling refusing to eat his cereal, from writer/director Ryan McHenry.
Or so the efforts to suppress his influence would have us believe. (The USSR, for instance, cleared out Khan’s homeland in Mongolia and forbade any mention of him.) But I’m here to tell you that we can learn more about leadership and getting things done from Genghis Khan than just about any other historical figure. Because almost everything you know about him is wrong…
An average of 270,000 rapes occur in the United States each year; or 1.3 women are forcibly raped each minute. These are the ones reported to police. Only 16% of rapes are reported.
But at the end of the day, no matter what other ridiculousness is going on, ask yourself: can you imagine living without this person?
“Who has she slept with since me?”
Don’t just hate stuff – vocalize your disdain for the restaurant, the food, the drinks, the prices, the temperature, the lighting, the other customers, the glasses, the plates, forks, knives, spoons and napkins.
Here’s EL James’ S&M fantasy as imagined by some of Hollywood’s finest — and Michael Bay.
If there were psychiatrists around when Jesus Christ was alive, he’d be diagnosed Bipolar I disorder with psychotic symptoms and put on heavy medication.
You have come to understand, that things just don’t fit here, in New York City.
I left the house in a rush, determined to get where I was going.
Dug this one up from 2008 today. Remains an both an excellent example of the power of logic on true closed-mindedness and another reason we can restore our faith in humanity.
Relationships are not merely a way to pass the time; they are often how we measure our time.
Here’s a remixed version of TIME’s most recent attempt to sell copies of their magazine. What do y’all think?