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You Win

We could have been civil. But you were not civil, were you? You played the long con. You were in it to win it. And win it you did.

What Your Facebook Profile Says About You

Everyone hates you and your stupid relationship. Everyone secretly makes fun of your constant back-and-forth of “love u baby” on your respective timelines. Everyone is going to quietly rejoice when the two of you finally break up — and you will.

The Fear Of Getting Hurt Again

You are closed off. So closed off and sometimes it feels good to be the only one who can disappoint you, doesn’t it? By never relinquishing your power, you are never at the mercy of other people. Perfect, right?

I Believe In You

You’d rather come up with excuses, or sabotage, or not try at all than try and fail, than to prove right what you think everyone believes about you and so what you believe about yourself.

Forgetting Your First Love

It’s important that I never forget you, although I have a feeling that it’s not entirely up to me. Time dictates what gets remembered and what gets left behind. I’m at the mercy of the clocks. Sure, I can make suggestions and forceful nudges but at the end of the day, I’m powerless.

8 Things 90s Kids Miss About MTV

Undressed, MTV’s own soap opera about youth culture and college life, showed sexually active young people faced with very important problems we were probably all facing at exactly the same time.

Losing Feeling

Occasionally I think about the fact that, as of the last time I checked, the comedian and late-night TV personality Jay Leno had five serious girlfriends or wives, and they all share the same birthday.

22 Little-Known Facts About ‘Seinfeld’

Festivus was actually not created by George’s father, Frank Costanza. The fake holiday was created well before the series was even conceived in 1966 by an editor of Reader’s Digest named Dan O’Keefe, who created it to celebrate the anniversary of his first date with his wife.

I’m On Ambien

he is a ‘long struggling poet’ with ‘extreme reverance for art’ and is thus pretty socially isolated and critical towards me in sort of obvious ways

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