On Your Weakest Days, Let Me Be Part Of Your Mess

Felix Russell

Let me stand beside as you figure your crazy life out. Let me be part of that endless confusion. Let me stay up with you on your sleepless nights and wake up next to you on your lonely mornings. Let me try to solve the puzzle with you, maybe I can help you find the missing piece or at least remind you that you can solve your puzzle all by yourself. Remind you of how incredible you are.

Let me be part of your transition because I’ve been there before and I know what it feels like when every direction feels wrong and every decision is hard to make and there’s more chaos than peace, but when I look back, I remember the people who helped me find balance, the people who helped me find myself again and the ones who cheered me on when I had nothing to be proud of. Let me be part of your transition because I want to be there. I want to cheer you on. I want to be there for you when you have no one. I wan to be the only one.

Let me be part of your journey. Because life is not meant to be shared in doses — if someone is in for the ride, they’re in for the whole ride; the ups and the downs, the good and the bad, the happy and the sad. Let me be part of the scary moments. Tell me the thoughts in your head. Tell me your problems and let’s find a way to fix them. Tell me what I need to do to make you feel better because I don’t want you to go through any of this alone. I don’t want you to be too hard on yourself. I don’t want you to carry that weight by yourself because it’s too heavy. Let me carry it with you. Let me make this journey a little less lonely. A little less terrifying.

Let me be part of your mess because life is messy and if I’m going to have any role in your life, I want to have the hardest one. I want to have the one you don’t give anyone else. I want to have the one that’s hardest to win. I want to have the leading role. 

I want to show up and exceed your expectation and crush anyone who ever doubted you. I want to play that role because it comes naturally to me. I won’t have to pretend or act. I won’t even have to study for it. I know how to be that person for people because I had to be that person for myself time and time again, but more than anything, I want that role because it means being next to you. It means having every right to stand beside and say that you picked me for that role and I’m just fulfilling it. I’m doing my part.

I know how hard it is to let people in when you’re sad or confused, when you’re not feeling your best, when you don’t know what tomorrow will bring but there are two types of people in this world, the ones who only want to be in your life when things are going well and the ones who want to be in your life no matter what’s happening in it and I belong to the latter.

I’m here for the storms and the sunshine. I’m here for the rain and the rainbow. I’m here for the messy and the linear. I’m just here.

Maybe I don’t have what it takes to fix everything, but I can promise you that I’ll always be here. Holding on. Believing in you. Willing to be part of your story. It’s that simple. I’m here for it all. Nothing is going to change that. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.

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