Your future is not defined by those who left, you shouldn’t have to wait for anyone or plan your future around someone who left in hopes they could come back.

Your future is not tied to the ones who don’t care about having you in their future, it’s not tied to anyone who leaves and expects to come back and find you.

Your future is not tied to the ones who couldn’t love you or the ones who didn’t believe in you, it’s not tied to the ones who told you that you can’t do certain things or follow your dreams, it’s not tied to the people who wanted you to settle for a life you didn’t enjoy.

Your future is not tied to the ones who fooled you, the ones who made promises they couldn’t keep, the ones who kicked you when you were down, the ones who pretended to be your friends because they needed something from you. Your future is not tied to anyone who betrayed you or anyone who took your love and kindness for granted.

You don’t have anything to prove to these people, you don’t have to work so hard to prove them wrong and you don’t have to consider them anymore when making a decision. Their opinions don’t matter, their criticism will no longer be heard and what they think of you shouldn’t bother you because they’ll never see you for who you are and they’ll never see you as someone capable of doing great things because they’re only interested in seeing themselves, they’re too busy focusing on their own greatness to realize yours.

Your future is not tied to anyone who doesn’t think you’re great or someone who is not afraid of losing you. Your future is not tied to people who belittle you or make you feel small, it’s not tied to people who forget you. Your future is not tied to people who make you feel like you’re not good enough.

Because the people in your life make all the difference; in your confidence, in your energy, in your determination, in your willpower, in your self-love and in how you see the world and the future. So don’t pick people who make you fear the future or attract the same toxic patterns of the past, don’t pick people who are waiting for the first sign of trouble to leave, don’t pick people who find excuses to leave instead of reasons to stay.

Don’t pick people who won’t make your future brighter, only pick those who are not afraid of the dark and know how to find the light. Pick the ones you can count on because you will need the right kind of people around you when you’re down. Pick the ones who love you enough to stay no matter how difficult your journey will be. Pick the brave ones, the ones who are only scared of losing you.

Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.