You Were My Happy Home But Now I Need To Move

 averie woodard
averie woodard

You were my comfort zone, the place I’d go to when I wanted to be taken care of, the place I’d run to when I was scared and the place I’d hide in when I only wanted to feel loved and when I didn’t want to face the real world.

You were my shelter from all the ugliness in the world and you were my shield from all the hardships of reality.

But if I truly want to live, I have to go out and face reality. I have to come out of my shell and see what the world has to offer. If I truly want to live, I can’t die here.

I know you want to protect me because you’ve seen enough bad things that makes you worry about what I might have to go through, but sometimes I have to figure out my way without you handing me the map.

Sometimes I just need to get lost without you finding me.

Sometimes I just need to hit rock bottom without you picking me up.

Because nothing in life is guaranteed — not even you and I can’t depend on you to save me every time. I need to learn how to save myself.

I need to be on my own, without you. There must be more to life than this — there must be more to me than this.

It’s easy to think that a certain place is the best when you haven’t seen other places and this is my case with you.

You’re the best home I could ask for but I need to see other homes, I need to live in other neighborhoods, I need to sleep in different beds and I need to drive through unfamiliar roads.

You’ll always be the home that has my heart but it’s my soul that’s on the prowl this time.

But I promise you, you’ll always have a home in me, no matter how far I move. I promise you, I’ll never forget the years you painted a happy home for me, the years you tried to convince me that life is easy and smooth and the years you made me feel beautiful.

Now I need to paint my own version, I need to create my own life, I need to find my own beauty and I need to understand who I really am.

But one thing will never change — you will always be the home I come back to when my life turns upside down.  TC mark

Rania Naim

Writing makes me feel alive. Words heal me.

Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again

Nothing scares me more than someone loving me one day and deciding they don’t want me the next. Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again.

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