1. When you catch yourself obsessing over and living in the past.
Yes, once in a while it is healthy to reminisce the past, but catching yourself replaying it almost every day is over the line. Some of us spend an immeasurable part of our lives recollecting the past and letting it control our present. Don’t allow yourself to live in years or even months ago.
You should accept that some doors are not meant to be opened again, and some moments shall remain memories. Accept that no matter how hard you try to work things out, things will never be the same as they were before. You know it’s time to let go when you are more in love with the memories rather than the person that you’re with.
2. When you started keeping score.
What are you trying to prove? A relationship is not a basketball game, or any game for that matter. Your partner is not your enemy! You do not need to tally each time your partner makes a mistake, just so you can get back on him when it’s your turn to screw things up. Remember that a healthy relationship involves no-game playing.
3. When you cannot recognize yourself anymore.
When you feel less than yourself, like you were compromising your life goals whenever you’re around him. Like your true self diminished in someone you couldn’t even recognize. When you can no longer make decisions alone and you know that the minute he walks out on you is the minute your life will fall apart, it’s time to let go! You should not let yourself be held back by anyone. You should be allowed to grow and change. Remember that a healthy relationship does not lack encouragement and support.
4. When you voice your concern, and he only gets defensive and starts a fight.
Voicing your concerns and working through problems are vitamins in a relationship. On the other hand, stonewalling and negating are the poison pills. Your relationship will no longer work if your partner does not have receptive ears and is not willing to meet you halfway.
5. When you can go days, even weeks, without resolving arguments.
I’m sure that during the first few months of your relationship, the two of you won’t go to bed without fixing things. But as months go by, you notice that little by little, things change and you can both sleep easily while on unpleasant terms. That simply means that you don’t care enough anymore.
6. When you know.
I’m sure that there is a reason why you’re still reading up to this point. If you’re experiencing at least one of these signs, stop and ask yourself if misery outweighs happiness in your relationship. It’s not worth it to willingly give someone your everything when you know they couldn’t even give back the half of it. It’s time to let him go because no matter how hard you trick yourself in believing that something good can still come out of it, what is left is not love and it’s not even care.
Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. You may think that now it’s the most sorrowful door you’ll ever have to close and that it’s tough to rebuild yourself after someone completely destroyed. But let me tell you this, one day you will smile, a smile of finally feeling that you’ve found your place. And that’s when you’ll know how worthy are you.