I’m Not Letting My Heartbreak Define Me

Brooke Cagle
Brooke Cagle

Relationships may sound like a very fancy idea, just thinking about it triggers happy thoughts and all kinds of beautiful things that go with it. Flowers, gifts, kisses, intimate touches, endearments, bonds, and precious moments spent together. Now, that really sounds magical! Well, there’s no wonder about it, for they say – Love, is the closest thing to magic.

Loving is always coupled with pain. These two always come together in a tight, boxed package – A great deal of fate that you have to buy in combo, upon letting your heart decide.  The reason why? It’s really self-explanatory, to be honest.

We love because we want to be loved, we love because it’s inevitable, and we love because we are naturally capable of doing it. However, in as much as we are willing to give and feel loved, we intuitively refuse to go through pain. What we deny to accept is that, loving is deemed partners with heartbreak; and we, as human beings are not excused! Being human gives us the certainty of committing mistakes, may it be accidentally and intentionally… and for that very reason, we become prone to heartbreaks and pain, discouragements and downfalls. Surprisingly though, our ability to give and receive the mystical potion of deep affection such as love does not weaken. For instances, we do it so easily and willingly that we forget what our lenience might bring us later on, in the long run. That is when the so called, ‘heartbreak’ comes to play. Since you know it is inevitable, folks, we must remember a few things…

No matter how broken you get, don’t let sorrow consume you. 

Heartbreak is defined as a sorrowful event in a person’s life, and there is a long list of explanations out there that might cause someone to feel it. When a relationship ends, and I mean any kind of relationships, a massive part of our personality gets stained. Sharing our life to others is such a subtle issue, for it takes commitment to actually stay in love and devoted to a person. If a relationship ends, unspoken words may have to remain unheard. That’s because, pain becomes bearable when you know less.

On the other hand, deep explanations also set us free. Whatever the case may be, let not sorrow eat you. It is true that heartbreak can tear us apart, but we can always choose to withstand sorrow and fight loneliness. Never get drawn in your own pool of loneliness, and never let the monster inside devour you. Let your wound throb however long it may want, but never let your pain turn you in to a villain.

Even when you’re slashed to pieces, choose to be made whole again. 

You can’t be broken forever! You should never choose to be ‘heartbroken’ constantly. You may take your time to accept and contemplate, but after that, get up and revive yourself. Mend your heart and allow yourself to heal. If you’re broken, you can always do something to glue your fallen shards at a time. You don’t have to rush, what matters is that you are willing to make yourself whole again, and that you are actually doing the transition to fix yourself.

The tendency of getting broken is really decisive, for we often choose to give our 100% thinking everything will finally workout this time around, and that’s okay! It’s not your fault that the people you stayed loyal to, chose to break you. Forgive them… but don’t forget what they did to you.  Let your pain become your motivation to be joyful, and let what once broke you lead you to the newer and stronger you.

Don’t let your heartbreak define you.

Other people may say something, and they will always do, but that’s just them; your opinion about yourself is the most important definition you could ever consent to. If you think their view is different from you, always choose to be more practical and listen to your instinct. The best way to understand you is by taking in and conceiving enough kindness and understanding. If people mock you just because you were once emotionally wrecked, let them be. Your shoes will never fit their feet, so don’t ever try to justify your experience. Choose to understand why you had to go through all the pain, and as you do that, choose to be optimistic and open-minded. Be very forgiving with yourself, and always decide on being defined as “the person who was once broken, but chose to be sanctified and whole again”.

Never let your heartbreak define you, because that measly event in your lifetime is nothing, compared to the greatness you are bound to achieve. You will encounter more and as you go through it all, you will surely come out a lot stronger than when you first fell down. Your heartbreak will teach you to define yourself, to define your purpose and to define your standards. Always choose compassion over prejudice; above all – always be courageous and kind. TC mark

Related

More From Thought Catalog