Why me? you cry, as something shitty happens in your life that thousands of other people are going through as well. What did I do? you yell at the sky, blaming every other being but yourself for the way things are working out. Why is the world out to get me?
Instead of saying, why me? Maybe ask…well why not me?
I have spent multiple nights tear-staining my pillow, internally screaming WHY ME?! Why does this happen to me? Why did they want to hurt me? Why am I never good enough? Why did they take her away from me? Why is the world out to get me?
I don’t know the particular moment I stopped letting myself think like that. I won’t lie and say that I never have those self-destructive thoughts, because I think that’s just part and parcel of being a human. I am self-aware enough, however, and (I believe) at times a little bit wiser, now, and can stop the thought halfway and internally fight back; you are not alone in your issues.
Some people get the worse end of the stick and some people get the better. I often find that the people who deal with some of the worst of it, but with maturity and grace, are the ones who seem to have it all together. They are the ones we enviously watch from the other side of the fence, watering their grass as we sit on our dried out, prickly, making our bum itchy grass, and say why do they have it so good?
You know why they have it so good? Because they bother to make it look like they water their grass. They don’t sit on their ass and enviously watch everyone else’s lives. And they most definitely don’t compare their lawn to yours.
The grass is never actually greener on the other side.
The world is cruel, there’s no doubt about it. Every single minute there is death, hunger, hatred and heartbreak. It’s incredibly unfair and seemingly doles out the hard times all at once, or all to the same people.
But the world is also magical. There is so much love and life in everything we do.
Self-pity is inevitable, but jumping into, and making a home in, a pit of pity is not okay. It will truly make you feel as if the world is weighing on your shoulders and it’s picking on you and only you.
How you perceive the world around you is entirely your mindset. We could go as far as saying that the world is created in your mind, but we’re all a little too sober for that talk. Read a good book, take a long walk, call your mates that make you laugh, tell your parents you love them. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: life is messy and magic all at the same time. The world is not out to get you.