We tell ourselves we want the guy who proves to us that chivalry isn’t dead. You know, the one who always holds the door, texts back, genuinely cares about you and your feelings, picks you up for adventures and is always there for every rollercoaster life throws at you.
But then we go for the guys who leave us on read or just straight up leave.
I don’t think it’s as simple as just opening our eyes to all the other fish in the sea until we find the right one.
I think we have to look for something deeper within us. We have to find the pain, fear, and anxiety bundled up into the depths of our very souls that we’ve buried away and refused to let anyone get close to. We have to look back to see where there are scars that never healed. We have to find the things that make us lie to ourselves and others when we say “I’m fine”. We have to pull all of that out and bring it to the light so we can accept it and learn from it. If we do this, we can love ourselves enough to stop accepting the bad guys who just leave us with even more pain, fear and anxiety than we had before.
Still, there will always be bad guys who say what you want to hear and then leave your heart shattered on the ground in a million pieces. In times like these, know that you are enough. Know that you have the strength to stand up and brush yourself off. Then you can go out and prove to all of them that you are worth more than anything they could have given you.
I’m not saying it will be easy. It might not even feel worth it until you’re on your third, fourth or even tenth fish. But know that there’s a nice guy out there who is texting back, holding the door, going on adventures and just waiting until he can finally meet you and prove to you that chivalry isn’t dead.
Yes, he’ll finish last.
But, we always save the best for last, don’t we?