However there’s one particular aspect of this excruciatingly short attention span that’s been a real thorn in my side — if side means bank account and thorn is excessive depletion. It takes so very little for me to get bored of my closet; I don’t even have to be in the same country as my closet to become irritated and wholly fed up with it. Which is why styling tips like the ones below are not only helpful, but crucial. I have neither the time nor the funds to buy something new every time I feel that itch for instant retail gratification creeping up on me.
1. Wear long underwear.
I’ve always been a crusader for long underwear. And now so is Katie Hillier, apparently.
It suggests that you mean business, in an Under Armour kind-of-way. And think about it: if you ever see a man going for a run while wearing Under Armour under his shorts, you never think to yourself, “He looks unexperienced.” No. You think, “Wow, what a well-rounded man.”
I imagine taking them on and off wouldn’t be particularly easy — that it might require some lethal mixture of olive oil and a steam room. But then again: why even take them off? Keep them on for a whole week and the time spent in the morning trying to figure out your outfit for the day just got a little bit easier. Eh?
2. Wear your tube dress over things.
The tube dress hasn’t had an easy run; you could say it’s been through the ringer. Back in the ’90s, tube dresses were worn by practically everyone; every Spice Girl had one catered to her respective theme, movie stars were wearing them in gown form to award shows and it seemed as if they’d never lose their appeal. But after Lindsay Lohan hijacked them in the mid-2000s, their stock plummeted. And now the land of tube dresses is a deserted, barren wasteland.
I bet you were just about to chuck your tube dress too, right? (Lance, I’m looking at you.) Well — hold on. Before you do, there are but two more ways you can style it: over an entire outfit, as many of the Marc by Marc girls wore theirs down the runway this past week, or over a long-sleeved button-up, à la Suno.
3. Wear your bag over your shirt but under your jacket.
Don’t ask questions, just…trust me. It’s the new wear-your-jacket-like-a-shawl, which has been seeing its heyday for quite some time now, and which I still haven’t adapted to. Unless I’m standing verrrry still and am entirely blocked by any and all wind, I find resting my jacket on my shoulders to be completely unrealistic. I see fashion editors do it, while skipping from one show to another, holding a clutch with one hand and texting on their cell phones with the other and I think: Blast! And then: No but seriously, how?
The bag-over-your-shirt-but-under-your-jacket is the new, much more feasible iteration of the wear-your-jacket-like-a-shawl. And — at least in my case — much sleeker too. I’ll let The Row do the explaining:
4. Let your belt hang.
I’m always reluctant to wear a belt with a dress, and only because the whole idea of “cinching” jut rubs me the wrong way. It stirs up memories of my over-cinching days of yesteryear, and just the general faux pas that is assuming a cinched waist will fix anything. But Donna Karan’s show this year was a crucial reminder not to chuck any and all prospects of a cinched waist altogether; that sometimes, it works. And I think it has something to do with her belts’ likenesses to seat belts, plus the fact that she didn’t style them too formally. Instead she looped the belt over itself to create a simple, clean knot and then let the end of the belt hang.
5. Socks and heels is still a thing people!
To discover that socks and sandals are still in is to, once again, let out a big sigh of relief. Because firstly, it eliminates the need to buy new shoes for the colder seasons, keeping your sandals relevant all year long. And secondly, it means there’s still a chance you can beat your record for the longest you’ve gone without a pedicure!
6. Buckle your backpack in the front.
K, you know your backpack from 7th grade? Remember that part that was supposed to clasp at your chest that your mom would buckle for you before you went off to school and that would leave you saying “Mooooooommmmmmmmmmmmm, stooooooooooopppp!” You would unbuckle it as soon as you were out the door because, despite the fact that wearing it this way makes it exceedingly more snug and comfortable, you couldn’t risk taking style tips from your mom. Well guess what? As is usually the case, your mom was onto something. So pull out that rotting Jansport and buckle that front strap because…well…you’re not going back to middle school, but it is in.