The first heartbreak felt like the end of the world. The second wasn’t much different while the third came with more of a you’ve got to be kidding me vibe. Despite all three heartbreaks occurring before high school ended, they still managed to leave an emotional imprint on me; the kind that left me questioning if relationships are forever meant to come and go.
The cherished by-products of living are too often lost in the emotional pain of the breakup cycle. Really living presents endless opportunities to gain experiences and perspectives that help us to grow and be prepared for relationships that have long term potential. While the “one” comes and goes, the “right one”; the one who makes you laugh, feel confident, strong, hopeful and beautiful may be off cycling through relationships themselves. While each cycle gives you insights into yourself and helps define what you want in a relationship, the “right one” is also being sculpted into an individual who is growing in the same way.
Love is a process for most of us. Trial and errors that over time translate into relationship do’s and don’ts.
Maybe you’re the person who overshares and welcomes someone in too quickly. Maybe your heart is too big for your own good and when it all ends you’re left feeing naked; stripped of the trust you too quickly gave to someone else.
Maybe you’re the one who builds up walls so high that even you can’t see over the top of them. No one wants to feel vulnerable, unfulfilled and like a failure but sometimes that’s precisely the process of learning to love when the future “right one” comes along.
Heartbreak can be suffocating, leaving you filled with so many questions.
Heartbreak can also be the most rewarding feeling in the world. What??? Did I just say that!
If hindsight is 20-20 then heartbreak in hindsight can be a magnifying lens that helps you to achieve an honest balance between who you are and who you were during those past relationships.
The key is not only to look back at the lessons heartbreak has taught you but to look forward knowing that you decide who is worthy of your love and as hard as this is to admit, of your vulnerability.
In the end, it is the heartbreak you felt from all those frogs you kissed that will be a silent reminder of just how thankful you are those frogs weren’t mistakenly taken as your prince.