If you’re anything like me, you dwell in the past a lot. A lot more than necessary. Your current decisions, thought processes, character, relationships, and views lean on experiences you’ve had in the past.
And you’re constantly going back to the “person you used to be.” The constant refrain – I wish I was as *insert good trait* as I was back then. If only I had the guts I had as a kid. If only I cared less. If only I could go back…
Yes, you might be afraid right now. Admittedly, a lot has changed since you were the ideal person your mind remembers yourself as. But, you’ve grown. You’ve grown in ways you can’t even begin to appreciate. The past is a wonderful place to visit, but a dangerous place to stay.
Learn to love who you are now. Look at the positive side of things, your journey, the steps you’ve taken to reach the place you have today. Other people may not see this. In fact, looking for other people’s acknowledgement in your journey is a sure way of setting yourself back mentally (unless, of course, it’s from your mum, because she loves you and only speaks the truth).
I’m going to be as cliche as it gets. But as someone who also has a slightly difficult time appreciating self growth and viewing myself as the amazingly wonderful person that I am (what is this dance between self-confidence and self-deprecation?!) these words are as important to me as they are to you.
You have purpose. You are gifted and a light to those around you. You will face challenges, difficulties, loss, and despair (there I go again, Miss Morbid), but you will rise above them with grace and strength.
Everyone is different. I remember how as a kid, I’d obsessively watch tennis games, mastering the position, technique, strokes, and movements of different players. But the more I did this, the more I realized how different everyone was. Some people were just naturally oriented towards the fast paced flat game while some just loved to spin every ball in unending rallies. Some people killed the ball at the earliest opportunity (like me) while some preferred a long, drawn out rally. Some players lived at the baseline while some lived for volleys. Everyone had a different kind of game and this was okay.
The same thing applies to life, characters, and personality. You weren’t meant to look like that person you really want to look like. You weren’t meant to have the same personality as your siblings. You weren’t meant to be anything you’re not. You were meant to grow into the truest form of YOU, which means accepting your flaws and strengths and working on being the best you. Yes, it’s tempting to want to be what seems to be the best. But say, what if, that was you all along? What if the grass has always seemed greener on the other side only because you forgot to water yours?
So, let’s do this today.
Let’s water our own grass and revel in our own awesomeness and individuality. Let’s abandon the need to look back on our past selves and on other people and feel like we fall short. Let us embrace our technique, own and hone it all the way up to excellence.
The truth is no one is you, and that is your superpower!
From a girl who needs to convince herself the same