Every time I asked myself how it feels to be loved, I always think of you. Of how it used to be. How it should look. Of how the changes made a way to destroy us. Of how you and I lay in each other’s hand.
Love, every time I asked myself how it feels to be loved – I always see the other side. Suddenly I realized, I forgot to remember how to be loved by you.
I forgot to remember how you made my mornings’ beautiful. How your long and sweet daily morning essay, made to start my day amazing and gave me the smile no one can ever give me. How you keep on giving small kisses all around my face when I’m asleep just to wake me up and finally fall asleep in your arms. Because all I remember now, is how you forgot to send me a message of “Good morning.” and how the day flies without really having a conversation. How you throw some things on the floor when I cut your sleep in the morning for us to have breakfast together.
I forgot to remember how you made my tantrums and mood swings our sweet little childish fights. How you keep on telling me to stop being a kid, but in your own sweet lovely way. How you never get tired to show affection when my mood swings doomed us. Because all I remember now, is how you keep on cursing me when I’m acting like a kid. How you ignore and put your attention to your personal things when all I needed is your attention towards me. How you get angry and how you shout at me when all I want for you is to caress and give your attention to me.
I forgot to remember how you listened to my never ending daily stories to you. How you look me in the eyes as if you understood every little thing I told you. How you made me feel like you will always be there to listen to all of my stories, worries, problems, and rants. Because all I remember now, is how you tell me to go to bed and sleep when in reality I want to share what happened on my day to you. How you made me realize that I have to know how to keep all of my worries to myself.
I forgot to remember how sweet and proud are you that I am your girlfriend. How proud are you while holding my hand in front of the others. How you keep on posting sweet thoughts on social media just to tell everyone that you are proud to have me. How everyone around us can see the love we have for each other. Because all I remember now, is how you reject when I wanted to go out and have a date with me. How your bad thoughts in our relationship are posted in social media, how bad I am with you. How everyone can see the love between us is already fading.
I forgot to remember how we made our memories. How clingy are you towards me. How we took pictures of ourselves with every date we had. How you made me feel that we deserve each other. How you made me realized that I am the one for you. How you took my breath away with every surprises you made for me. How you made the people around us to tell me that I’m the luckiest because I have you. How you and I do really love each other.
I forgot to remember all of it. I forgot to remember how to be loved by you, because you gave me reasons to forget everything. And now, with just one night – I remember everything. Yes, I remember, but I don’t remember how it feels like.
All I want you to know is that I miss you. I miss you, and I want to remember how it feels to be loved by you again.