woman wearing gray and black scarf

This Is How You Miss Them Without Wanting Them Back

Moving on is not forgetting.

Moving on is waking up to empty sheets and no good morning text and making only one cup of coffee. Moving on is not telling them about your day or tomorrow’s plans or the dream you had last night. Moving on is not asking what they’d like for dinner, what to watch on Netflix later, what they want to do next Friday or the rest of their lives.

Moving on is not letting them know you got home safely. Not texting when you think of them. Not calling when you want to talk. Moving on is putting your phone down, not sending the goodnight snap in your underwear, not checking what they’re up to, whom they follow, whose photos they liked.

Moving on isn’t getting back together when the time is right. Moving on isn’t waiting for them to be ready. Moving on isn’t hoping they will change their mind and show up at your doorstep. Moving on is standing in the crowd as the band plays wishing they were there but knowing that they’re not.

Moving on is sitting on that couch the night you met and crumbling on that bench the moment they left and shivering under that street light where you first kissed and shaking at that gate where you said thank you for everything and reliving the magic and the pain and the beauty of it all, and then carry on doing the dishes.

Moving on is meeting someone new and finding that the sound of their voice, the taste of their lips, the smell of their skin are not what you remember. Moving on isn’t about replacing them. Moving on isn’t you’ll find someone soon, you deserve better anyway, there’s plenty of fish in the sea. Moving on is not giving a fuck about fish in the sea but swimming on your own.

Moving on isn’t about deleting every moment, removing every touch, erasing every word from your memory. Moving on is still caring, but carrying on regardless. It’s finding a place in your heart for them to stay where it doesn’t hurt. It’s releasing what’s gone. It’s letting things be. It’s loving from afar. It’s stepping into life after. Life after them. Life without them.

No, moving on is not forgetting.

Moving on is learning how to miss them without wanting them back.

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