How To Get Over Someone Without Absolutely Hating Them

Some people are not going to like you. In fact, they are going to dislike you. They may even hate you. Maybe they have a reason. Maybe you did something mean. Maybe you said something rude. Maybe you got too drunk on your 22nd birthday and made out with their boyfriend on the back of a Vespa. Maybe they hate you because you beat them in a game of poker.

Maybe they hate your look, your smile, your attitude, your positivity, your negativity, your car, your dog, your skin color, your eyes, your hair. Maybe they hate you cause you broke their heart on a rooftop in Manhattan. Maybe they hate you because you’re intelligent. Maybe they hate you because you remind them of a part of themselves that they’re scared of. Maybe they have no reason at all to hate you but they just do.

Don’t let yourself hate them back.

There is nothing noble about disliking someone. Hatred is not poetic. It’s not this elusive, esoteric, sexy concept that gives purpose to life. You’re better than that. Move on. Grow up. Become something bigger. Find joy in watching people grow, not sink. It’s impossible to hate anyone whose story you truly know. It’s impossible to feel their pain, their crippling insecurities, their wounds, their let-downs. You must feel your own emotions and channel them away from hate. Don’t become so disillusioned that you can’t see past your own pain.

Every once in a while stop and ask yourself what is holding you back and why are you letting it? Heal yourself in absence of destroying others. Walk closely with people you love but don’t walk away from those you hate. Embrace them. Know that your hatred only speaks truth about the content of your own character.

You don’t have to hate in order to move on.

You don’t have to hate in order to let go.

You don’t have to hate in order to heal. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


More From Thought Catalog