Life had been both gentle and cruel to you. You’ve been through enough experiences that brought you pain, discouragement, and difficult times that you have pushed on even when you felt you couldn’t. All those things that shaped you for who you are as a person today. It made you realize many things and gave you a clear perspective in life. But had you ever thought that maybe God put you through all of those situations for some purpose?
He put you through hard times because he wants to use you to help other people. That’s what empathy means, trying to put yourself in other people’s shoes to understand their perspectives and using it to guide your actions. You understand their reasons and feelings, why they do it or why are they like that. You understand how it feels that’s why you don’t judge them, that’s being empathetic.
You’re always putting other people’s feelings first even if you’re the one who’s breaking. You resist on being unreasonable because you don’t want to be the immature one. You forgot that your feelings are valid too. That’s why at the end of the day, you end up understanding them although your own thoughts are eating you alive. You’re always trying to help other people, when in fact you’re the one who needs help. You instantly became a psychologist when you’re giving them an advice, even you’re the one who’s struggling in your own thoughts. You keep saving everyone but you. It’s like you don’t want them to experience what you have been through, because you know what it feels like.
You feel as if you are made to understand but not to be understood.
I know it’s worse, but the last thing that I realized is being empathetic must be considered as a privilege. It means that you can be trusted and you’re just the kind of person that people can vent to when they have problems. Maybe it’s hard to have no one who can understand you, but it’s also a great feeling when you helped someone who exactly needs it.
So for you that have a big heart and empathetic personality, please stay strong. Experiences in life never stop teaching us. The most important is how you use it purposely. And someday, if you’re lucky enough, you’ll find someone who’s exactly like you. The one who will understands you even before you speak about it.